denmark Page index.xml - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
The Premier League’s holiday schedule is wonderful, and also needs to be ended
It wasn’t a huge shock that the BIG MEETING today with the Premier League clubs, managers, and assorted captains resulted in no change whatsoever. The Premier League, and those below it, will attempt to plow through the country’s latest COVID spike, as it decimates rosters, to try and preserve as mu...
Denmark can absolutely win the whole thing
We’ve reached the quarterfinals of Euro 2020(1), which is when fans of the countries still in contention really start dreaming, and the rest realize that fucking-off-of-work time is probably going to run out with only three Monday-Friday match days left (#DayDrinkingIsForAllSeasons). For the teams t...
Real Cross Country Delivers Real Redemption
Jakob Larsen, director of Danish Athletics, revealed at the pre-race press conference that the guiding concept behind the design of the 2019 World Cross Country Championships course was a scene from the movie Crocodile Dundee. “That’s not a knife; this is a knife,” says our man of the outback in th...
Here's A Nice Dad Thing
Denmark keeper Kasper Schmeichel may have ultimately been outdone by his Croatian counterpart, Danijel Subašić, during yesterday’s penalty shootout, but he still earned national hero status by saving Luka Modrić’s penalty late in extra time. A fun subplot that arose during the game was Schmeichel be...
Croatia Narrowly Avoid Fraud List After Surprisingly Thrilling Penalty Shootout Victory
Croatia-Denmark opened with a bang. Denmark used a mighty throw from Jonas Knudsen to set up what was frankly a panicky, little-league-ish scramble in the box, leading to a charmingly fluky goal from Mathias Jorgensen, helped along by Croatian keeper Danijel Subasic. This was in the first minute of ...
Denmark Will Go As Far As Christian Eriksen Takes Them
The vast majority of teams that make it to the World Cup don’t have a quart of Ben and Jerry’s ice cream’s chance in Jason Whitlock’s freezer of winning the thing. The latter stages of this edition feel particularly preordained, like if one of Brazil or Germany or Spain don’t win the tournament then...
Olympic Curling Qualifier Gets Hamstrung By Politeness, Finishes With Insane Danish Shot
One of curling’s unusual features, other than everything else, has been its politeness and sportsmanship. The first page of the official rulebook discusses The Spirit of Curling for a reason, as it points out that players should be the first to admit if they broke a rule. (Imagine if NBA or NHL play...
Soccer Player Quits Team After Learning Teammate Was Sleeping With His Wife
The man pictured above is Christian Keller, very recently the captain of Danish first-division club Randers. He and his fellow Horses had to bid adieu to one of their teammates today, after Jonas Borring announced that certain personal events had led him to decide to leave the club. What instigated ...
Zlatan Kills Denmark On The Field, Then Torches Them With Sick Burn
This version of Zlatan Ibrahimović is older and worse than the one we loved and feared. Not that a little thing like age could keep him from stomping out Denmark on his way to qualifying for Euro 2016, and dancing over the body in an interview after....
USMNT Felled By Hat-Trick Hero Nicklas Bendtner, Who Still Sucks
For the first time this year—at least the first time we'd like to remember—a fit and strong USMNT squad got some run. The opponent was Denmark, stiff competition to be sure. So while USMNT fans could've justifiably been cautiously pleased with the 2-1 lead our boys took into the final 10 minutes of ...
Cristiano Ronaldo Scores 95th-Minute Goal To Lead Portugal Over Denmark
Of course he did....
Arsenal Striker Nicklas Bendtner Rubbed His Dick On A Taxi Tuesday
While Arsenal were in Germany being ousted by FC Bayern in the Champions League on Tuesday, Gunners striker Nicklas Bendtner was getting shithoused in Denmark. He got so smashed, according to reports, that he threatened a cab driver, pulled out his cock, and humped the car. The Telegraph has more:...
Couple Caught Having Sex On Soccer Pitch
Brøndby and Randers played to a goalless draw on Sunday in Denmark's top league, but that doesn't mean no one scored....
To UEFA, Wrong Underwear Far Worse Than Fan Racism
Know this: UEFA is very protective of its sponsors. (Here are the Euro 2012 sponsors, soulless corporations all, and you should avoid their products for the remainder of the tournament. Except possibly Ukrsotsbank PJSC.) Paddy Power, the Irish bookmaker, is just as corporate and just as interested i...
As Good As It Feels, Coaches Probably Shouldn't Hit Reporters
Randers FC had a rough season, just barely escaping being relegated from the Danish Superliga. So it's inevitable that the media wanted to talk to manager Ove Christensen, and also inevitable that Christensen wouldn't want to talk....
Dennis Rommedahl Scores An Absolute Rocket
It may have escaped your attention, what with Wales and England's titanic battle at the Millennium Stadium being so tight and tense, but Norway played Denmark at the weekend and the score finished 1-1. BOOORING!...
World Cup Open Thread: Cameroon-Netherlands; Denmark-Japan
Cameroon is playing for pride and the Danes must win if they want to advance. Talk about the different nations' cuisine and follow the game action in the comments below....
World Cup Open Thread: Cameroon-Denmark
Pretty much a must-win for both teams after opening-game losses. Are we having fun yet?...
World Cup Open Thread: Netherlands-Denmark
Day 4 kicks off with The Flying Dutchpersons taking on the very punny Olsen's Eleven while people the world over incorrectly point out which country is which on a map. Follow the consonant-filled action below....
It's Probably Not Smart For This Guy To Show His Face In Esbjerg Anytime Soon
Over the weekend, a fan of Denmark's soccer team sprinted on the field and attacked a referee after a call went again the Danes. That's bad enough, but the real problem was that Denmark had rallied back from a three-goal deficit to the tie the game ... and after the attack, the referee abandoned the...