BEWARE THE 13 SEEDS. While Florida Gulf Coast was busy trashing your NCAA bracket, some rather notable underdogs advanced in the first round of our curse word bracket, including 13 seeds "cameltoe" (which beat out "screw" by less than a thousand votes) and "buttfuck" (which staged an astonishing triumph over curse word mainstay and 4 seed "shitfaced." Now it's time for the second round of voting, so click down below and advance your favorite.
A few more notes about the bracket:
- The top three seeds in every bracket advanced. However, I wouldn't count on things staying that way. "Boobs," everyone's least favorite 3 seed, has a second-round matchup against formidable 6 seed "tits." Such is the danger of being trapped in the Body Regional.
- A good showing for 11 seeds as both "fuckface" and "rimjob" advanced. Both could easily make it to the Sweet 16, in which case I will re-christen "rimjob" as "la rimjob," in honor of La Salle.
- Everyone's favorite 5 seed, "cunt," faces off against "piss." If it advances, "cunt" will go up against either "twat" or "pussy." By the end of the week, we'll all know America's favorite word for female genitalia. I couldn't be more excited. And to make things even livelier, "dick" and "cock" are going at it on the bottom of the bracket. Should be quite the duel.
- Can anyone stop "fuck"? It had the greatest margin of victory in Round 1, and only you, dear voter, can stop this tourney from becoming a de facto coronation. Will "motherfucker" triumph oedipally over its root curse word? And what about "shit"? It has the easiest path to the Filthy Four. And don't forget about all the people who were mad that "bitch" got left out of the bracket by accident. (If it's any consolation, I'm told "bitch" did win the NIT over Robert Morris.) Might they orchestrate payback by pushing "buttfuck" all the way through? There's only one way to know: VOTE, you jagoff. You have 24 hours.