Sports News Without Access, Favor, Or Discretion

A pair of underpants revolves slowly on the blade of a ceiling fan, your dog is wearing a sombrero and you are curled up, naked, around your TV, fast asleep. Congratulations, Astros fan ...
• NLCS, Game 6: Astros win the pennant! Astros win the pennant! And it may be time finally to retire the lyrics to this sad, mournful dirge once and for all.
• NLCS, Game 6: And a standing ovation is in order for the Cardinals, who made it exciting, or at least better than exhibition basketball.
• NHL: Could it be ... SATAN? Miroslav Satan's goal lifts Islanders past Rangers 3-2.


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