Anthony Weiner's Dong Tipped The FBI Off About New Clinton Emails

The FBI announced this morning that they plan to investigate a new batch of emails from Hillary Clinton, after finding them in “connection with an unrelated case.” That unrelated case? Disgraced horny former congressman Anthony Weiner sending dong shots to a 15-year-old.

The FBI opened their investigation into Weiner’s dong pics a month ago. They found these previously unknown emails while examining Clinton staffer Huma Abedin’s devices for that case.

The New York Times reports that there could be over 1,000 new pertinent emails, although it’s unclear how spicy the information they contain is.

Mr. Comey said the F.B.I. was taking steps to “determine whether they contain classified information, as well as to assess their importance to our investigation.” He said he did not know how long it would take to review the emails, or whether the new information was significant.

According to former MSNBC anchor David Shuster, the emails here were sent by Abedin and merely received by Clinton, but the right-wing media is treating this like it’s incontrovertible proof that Clinton is a lizard person attempting to purchase the presidency with babies’ hearts.

And we all got here because Anthony Weiner was a bad horny man who couldn’t stop himself from sending gross penis pics.