david-roth Page 13 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
What Weird New Behavior Will Donald Trump Display At The National Championship Game?<em></em>
A year and change into his first term in office, it’s still honestly kind of hard to tell why Donald Trump ran for president. At this point, we know enough about him to assume both 1) that it had nothing to do with any of the reasons he offered on the campaign trail and 2) that it’s probably somethi...
Deadspin Up All Night: The Man That Sank Atlantis
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. Have a great weekend....
Put Alex Jones In The Booth For <i>Monday Night Football</i>, Cowards
When ESPN made Rush Limbaugh a part of their Sunday NFL Countdown flagship back in 2003, the country was a different place. Everything that is currently bad and dumb about these United States was already very much in evidence, if maybe not quite in its current state of roaring psychedelic metastasis...
There Is Now An App For Triple Crown Ratio Lines On Bad Tweets, And It Rules
You are familiar, at this point, with how this all goes. Some verified foof on Twitter gets something grandly, gratingly wrong and then it gets...noticed. We are far enough along in the online part of our endless civilizational deadfall that we even have a name for this, now: that Bad Tweet and its...
Bless This Oafish Koch Heir And His Hideous Shirts
Because it is so cruel and so stupid, so petty and also so astonishingly vast, it is difficult to fully get a handle on the $1.5 trillion tax bill that the Republicans pushed through the House and Senate on Wednesday. A disconcerting number of little fees and insults in the bill are only now becomin...
Here Are The Most George Lucas-Ass Names In The NFL
For all the things that he has gotten wrong in his career as a mythmaker and world-builder and filmmaker and Extremely Satisfied-Seeming Beard-Haver, George Lucas has gotten the big things right. He’s seemingly constantly borne aloft on a cloud of oblivious self-regard, but also he created Star Wa...
Today In Fake Sports News: Jacksonville Jaguars Declare Bankruptcy, Because Of Thugs
If you are like most NFL fans, you were surprised to learn on Facebook yesterday—or the day before that, or last week—that a NFL team was preparing to declare bankruptcy due to, uh, the entitled and ungrateful thugs and the kneeling during the national anthem and the veterans there’s so many and you...
Amazing Online Hoax <em></em>Welcomes "Washington RedHawks" To The NFL
As a general rule, when the internet’s baking outer shitlands send aspiring creators of fake news, it isn’t sending us its best. It’s sending Destroy Belly Fat With One Weird Click fraudwads, it’s sending Macedonian click-hustlers and pinwheel-eyed domestic weirdos whose minds have been corroded by...
Quiz: Can You Tell Real MLB Draft Prospect Names From Fake Ones?
We are currently at that point in the baseball calendar when we are not strictly speaking really on the baseball calendar. Baseball-adjacent things are happening, or threatening to happen. Shohei Ohtani is giving the fans of seven teams a chance to think happy baseball thoughts, there are various de...
An Early Guide To The New York Giants' Head Coaching Search
On Monday, the New York Giants relieved head coach Ben McAdoo of his McAduties. It was somehow both a long time coming and abrupt—over a little under two seasons as the team’s coach, McAdoo first positioned himself as something like a rising star and then instantly and dramatically biffed everything...
Presenting The Al Pacino Matrix
In a lot of ways, getting old is fine. Your body starts doing a bunch of crazy new gross things, first little by little and then all at once, which is especially fun if you’re a fan of Franz Kafka or David Cronenberg. Old habits downshift into dorkier but less damaging obsessions, and you discover t...
The NFL's Stupid Pizza Wars Were Always Coming
Before he was installed by the electoral college as Supreme Grand Primate Of THE GREAT UNRAVELING, Donald Trump was just one of the more poignant accounts on Twitter. There was nothing sympathetic about him, really, because there has never been anything sympathetic about him. He has been the same wa...
The Wow Series
This piece originally appeared on Victory Journal....
Did Crybaby Loser Papa John Also Lose Our Chain Pizza Rankings?<em></em>
Indiana-born pizza impresario and rumored Bonzi Wells associate Papa “John” Schnatter is an American success story. In the conventional sense, all the (ahem) ingredients are there for a completely conventional American Dream Fulfilled narrative, and Schnatter indeed talks about them a lot—you can re...
FW: FW: The Seahawks Are Getting Kicked Out Of The NFL
Everyone is pretty pumped up, if we’re just going by the expressions on the faces of the Seattle Seahawks players and coaches arrayed about their locker room. Richard Sherman is cheesing like a five-year-old on photo day. If Pete Carroll was grinning any harder, his smile would somehow be larger tha...
Yasiel Puig Is The New Normal
There is no wrong choice, really, and also there’s no accounting for taste where extravagant full-body thrusting maneuvers and lusty bat flips are concerned. But my personal favorite Yasiel Puig moment of the MLB playoffs thus far isn’t one of the big ones. This should take nothing away from the tim...
Deadspin Up All Night: Turn Up The Volume
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. Next week I am going to learn how to use Kinja!...
A League Apart
This piece originally appeared on Victory Journal....
Trump Voters Say They Choose Trump Over The NFL
Vox journalist Dylan Scott, you will get no argument here: that chart, showing the reported opinions of Trump voters on the NFL, is indeed pretty nuts! The data, compiled by an online survey company called Morning Consult and laid out at the New York Times’s Upshot blog, tells the story of how the o...
The Short Life And Neverending Afterlife Of Rush Limbaugh's Disastrous ESPN Stint<em></em>
There is a physical thing that happens to a certain type of Famous Terrible American, and once this thing begins happening it does not stop. It does not happen to every Famous Terrible American, and the process does not begin at the same moment in their respective Famous, Terrible American lives; on...