Did someone really try to fight Michael Jai White?

The martial artist who doubles as an action star is not as common as it once was. There aren’t nearly as many Jet Li’s or Chuck Norris’ roundhouse-kicking foes into oblivion. The biggest box office smash that Michael Jai White was ever in was The Dark Knight, and he didn’t put a foot in anyone’s ass in that movie.

That certainly doesn’t mean that he is incapable. For the uncultured among you, he played Black Dynamite in the eponymously titled ode to the Blaxploitation movies of the 1970s. White put his eight black belts to good use in that movie by kicking everything that moved.

If there is a martial artist needed for a role in Hollywood, White is the best person to call for the job even at 55 years old. So the idea that someone in Hollywood even would be ignorant of White’s special set of skills is doubtful. According to Teej of the Slander U college football podcast, he was at a screening of the soon-to-be-released comedy/horror film The Blackening when an actor reportedly tried to fight White. Allegedly, a potentially extremely unfortunate altercation was broken up by some bystanders including an ex-NBA player.

Besides the fact that starting a fight at a social gathering is so 2004 insecure high-school student behavior, looking at White in the flesh should be enough to know not to mess with him. Fighting a muscular human being who also has a salt-and-pepper beard is always a terrible idea. Old-man strength combined with fitness is usually a sign to leave a person alone.

Even with all of the warnings that White gives off by simply existing, how can a person be invited to a screening for The Blackening and not know he is capable of kicking a head off of a person’s body? It takes a Google search to find out exactly how many black belts that White holds, but anyone familiar with him should know that if he chose to, he could kill with his bare hands in less than 30 seconds.

If the alleged person who got into with White wanted to score some masculinity points by challenging this martial arts master, the argument that men are stupid has been strengthened. Even if White was at fault, the winning play is not to fight him. Shaming him loudly for picking on an untrained person is the only option.

The main lesson to be learned from this alleged event mainly is that as an adult, don’t start fights in social settings. It’s highly unbecoming. A secondary — although still important — lesson is to not try and fight someone who everyone knows will not lose.

There are no bonus points to be gained from challenging a human lethal weapon.