No, American Soccer Fans, This Is Not How You Do Hooliganism

Last night, league leaders FC Dallas hosted the Los Angeles Galaxy in MLS play. The home side bested the defending league champions in a dramatic 1-0 victory, with the deciding goal coming from a corner kick three minutes before the death. Defender George John charged down the ball, which had ricocheted off the woodwork and bounced inside the six,, and headed it in to give FC Dallas their fifth win of the season's first seven matches. Hooray, right?

It was a great moment, until John ran around the post, ostensibly to go celebrate with his teammates and the Dallas faithful, before immediately collapsing to the ground like he'd been bottled in the back of the head. As it turns out, that's exactly what happened. An FC Dallas supporter—one of John's own fans—threw a bottle onto the pitch, absolutely smoking the defender and gashing open his skull. John was on the ground for a couple of minutes before recovering.

This is why we can't have nice things, American soccer fans. Something magical happens, something memorable, and we go and fuck it all up. Because as any European petty thug will attest, hooliganism isn't about violence. Well, not just about violence. Hooliganism is about loyalty.

h/t to Andy