Even ESPN Is Trying To Warn You About Tonight's Dreadful Ravens-Browns Game
Tonight, the Ravens and Browns will play what will most likely be the least appealing Monday night game of the season. Look at the schedule. Vikings-49ers was horrid, but at least we had Jim Tomsula reaction shots to entertain us. This game will have nothing.
At the beginning of the season, Ravens-Browns looked like it could be a compelling matchup between divisional rivals. The current Ravens, holding a 3-7 record, have no Joe Flacco or Justin Forsett. Their starting quarterback is Matt Schaub. Here’s how MNF sold this guy:
Two facts you need to know about Matt Schaub, baby: He’s bad, and he hasn’t played in a while. Are you ready for some football?
So, there isn’t much to rave about in Baltimore, despite replacement running back Javorius “Buck” Allen’s wonderful name and nickname. Meanwhile, the 2-8 Browns had Johnny Manziel. Putting aside the arguments about his quality of play, Manziel at least provided a reason to watch the game. Any objective NFL fan could at least be entertained by his successes or failures. Hell, ESPN devoted the entire promo to him (their revised spot is so dull):
And when Mike Tirico sarcastically plugged the game on Monday’s broadcast (“Do you love football? All right, we’ll test ya.”), Jon Gruden did his best to sell it to the viewers, calling it “exciting.”
This was all before Manziel was demoted to third-string quarterback for showing up in a video at a Texas nightclub during the team’s bye week, and explained the footage by saying, “Videos can be old.” Cleveland’s now starting Josh McCown, with Austin Davis backing him up. MNF is busting open the stat books for this showdown:
Please go look at the rest of to plug this game. A few of them involve Manziel, who, again, is not playing:
Earlier in the day, MNF made a public plea to think of the production crew that has worked very hard to bring you this pile of shit:
Those poor souls.
Top photo: AP
Contact the author at [email protected].
Guardians vs. Rays Prediction: Picks, Odds for ALCS Game 1
Brendan Allen Has Earned the Right to Fight for UFC Gold
Bills vs. Rams Odds, Prediction and Best Bet for MNF
Three Longshot NFL Futures Worth Betting in Week 5
- White Sox vs. Guardians ALDS Game 5 Betting Pick
- UFC Vegas 122 Betting Odds: The Biggest Line Moves Before Allen vs. Duncan
- UFC Vegas 122 Picks and Predictions: Three Bets for Allen vs. Duncan
- College Football Week 6 Bets: Three Picks for Saturday’s Biggest Games
- UFC Fight Night Underdog Pick: Why Kai Kamaka III Is Worth a Bet
- WNBA Playoff Picks: Best Bets for Liberty-Dream and Aces-Valkyries
- Friday College Football Best Bets: Iowa-Washington and BYU-Iowa State

