Football Page 1727 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Portis Becoming Subtle Character Actor
We've witnessed the newest Clinton Portis character, and we have to say, even though the costume leaves much to be desired, it might be our favorite one yet....
Hey, Saints, We Put Together A Little Dance For You
We don't want to imply that you should have another reason to root for the Redskins this weekend other than Clinton Portis' weekly exploits, but in case you need one, try this: Last week, in the Bucs' win over the Saints, the Raymond James Stadium loudspeakers played The Scorpions' "Rock Me Like A...
The Tragic Muzzling Of Chad Johnson
Well, it's the week before the Cincinnati Bengals' first playoff game in 15 years, and they're hosting it, against the hated division rival Pittsburgh Steelers. Man, oh, man, wide receiver Chad Johnson must be going crazy, right? What's he gonna do? Score a touchdown and smelt some ore? Strap on B...
Blogdome: Rose Bowl Edition
What they're saying on the Texas and USC blogs, the morning after ... • Burnt Orange Nation. "We're Number One! I embraced total strangers tonight the way I do my own family, and I came very close to crying tears of joy." • IndieWIRE SXSW. "Horns Win! The city of Austin is alive tonight." • Longho...
Rose Bowl: The Morning After
All right, all right, it's the morning after, and we still can't quite believe that game last night. Some more thoughts as we recover:...
Vince Young Becomes A Legend
We just watched one of the most incredible games we've ever seen, and we certainly hope you did too....
National "Title" Pants Party: Longhorns Vs. Trojans
It so rarely happens that even though we obviously need a playoff, it's pretty much impossible not to get excited about tonight's Rose Bowl BCS "title" game between Southern California and Texas. (We still hope the first quarter goes like this.) Hell, it's so exciting even the President was consi...
Are The Buckeyes In Trouble Again?
We don't want to overstep our bounds here — no, really — but we've been hearing a pretty persistant rumor in recent days concerning the Ohio State football program. If the rumors are true, be on the lookout for potential sanctions against the Buckeyes, with the offenses ranging from taking tests f...
Clinton Portis' Supermarket Sweep
Ever wonder what Clinton Portis might do if given $10,000 to spend in a Best Buy in the span of half an hour? Jeez, who hasn't?...
Maurice Clarett's Experienced Defense Team
Today's Maurice Clarett update: The "troubled" — that is to say, "known for pretty much everything other than being a football player — posted a $50,000 bond to be released after his charges of aggravated robbery. We'll put aside for a moment how a guy with little discernible income over the last ...
Culpepper: Lap Dances? Who, Me?
We don't want to overstate — and it probably won't happen, anyway — but if Vikings sex boat gods Daunte Culpepper and Bryant McKinnie get their way, we might be in for the real trial of the century....
Some 1 A.M. Bowl Goodness
We're never reminded more of just how old we're getting than when we watch college freshmen play sports. Penn State kicker Kevin Kelly, we swear, has to be lying on his birth certificate; there's no way he's older than 12. The poor kid finally erased the chances he'd be a Buckner-type goat by fina...
A Match Made In ... Well, In Detroit
We were marvelling this morning at the potential news: Matt Millen and the Detroit Lions are bringing in former Saints coach Jim Haslett for a job interview. We don't necessarily think that hiring Haslett would bring the Fire Millen crowd much closer to dragging the guy out of his house and having...
Orange Bowl: A Contrast In Coaches
Everyone's making a huge deal about the coaching legends Joe Paterno and Bobby Bowden facing off in the Orange Bowl tonight. They're the two winningest coaches in Division I-A history, and they're both still going strong. It's nice when old people do well....
Mexico Family Causing All Kinds Of Trouble
Much sturm und drang today concerning Little Mexico, Marcus Vick's, pretty blatant dick move during the Gator Bowl yesterday, pounding the left knee of Louisville's Elvis Dumervil. (You can see the video here.)...
Ma Sweets Will Punch You In The Mouth
What kind of woman would raise a man who would wear a costume like this? What kind of woman could raise such a spawn?...
Laura Quinn Gives Us A Fiesta Of Pain
Thoughts while watching about three hundred shots of Brady Quinn's sister, Laura, during the Fiesta Bowl last night: 1. We kind of miss that TV show, Xena, Warrior Princess. 2. We thought A.J. Hawk was some sort of famous skateboarder. Apparently we're confused. 3. Brent Musberger is still al...
The Weird Turns Of Maurice Clarett
We've been trying to get our minds around this whole Maurice Clarett story since we heard about it, but it's almost too confusing for us to keep up with. To recap:...
Saying Goodbye To Tice (And Others)
The grand tradition of the day after the NFL season came through in full force this year: Six NFL coaches were relieved from their duties on "Black Monday." One of them, Dick Vermeil — who is about to be played by Greg Kinnear in a new movie — retired, but everyone else went down like a sack of so...
Southeast Jerome In Heaven With Friends
OK, so as we showed you yesterday, Clinton Portis brought along some pals for his press conference yesterday. The conceit was that Southeast Jerome — who had been previously considered "lost" — had died and made it to heaven with all his friends. They included:...