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![The Air-Humping Chicago Bears Assistant Coach Is Really Gross [UPDATE: The Air-Humper Has Been Identified]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/Image_Not_Found_1x_qjofp8.png)
The Air-Humping Chicago Bears Assistant Coach Is Really Gross [UPDATE: The Air-Humper Has Been Identified]
Gross. That is really gross, dude. You're way too old to be doing stuff like this. I'm sure the "Hey loogit me y'all, I'm humpin' air. Hee haw!" routine used to be really funny back in your college days, but you're a grown-up now; a grown-up who should know that air-humping—especially while using ...

The Jets Are In Line For An Attendance Debacle Tonight
It's been reported that as of Friday, the Jets had 12,000 tickets remaining unsold for tonight's game against the Texans. It's understandable. MetLife Stadium is a remarkably joyless place to watch your team lose 59-6. But there have been no whispers of a blackout, so we can assume Woody Johnson has...

Cris Collinsworth Knows More About What's Going On With The San Diego Chargers Than Norv Turner
Cris Collinsworth predicted exactly how this game would end after noticing Jared Gaither lumbering before the final play, noting "Gaither looks lame, he's gonna have to get some help here or Wilson's gonna get a sack to end this game." And wouldn't you know it, Martez Wilson easily got to Rivers ...

"It's Sickening. And I was Embarrassed": Eric Winston Responds To Kansas City Fans Cheering Matt Cassel Injury
On NFL.com, Matt Cassel's afternoon was described as "an unbridled disaster." He was 9-for-15 with 92 yards and two interceptions. He also had a fumble on a third-quarter drive where the Chiefs were actually moving the ball. Then in the fourth quarter he was knocked out of the game with a head inj...

Pssst! It's Tom Brady And Peyton Manning: Your NFL Late Games Viewing Guide
And just like that, we are closer to week six. You probably grew some gray hairs and yelled at some neighborhood kids. The inexorable march of time persists. Enjoy what you can. ...

Here's The Hit That Knocked Robert Griffin III Out Of The Game
On third and goal from the three yard line Robert Griffin scrambled and then took a brutal shot to the head from Sean Weatherspoon near the sideline. Griffin III remained on the turf for a few moments and was eventually helped off the field....

NFL Network Reports That Jets Have Unsold Tickets For Monday Night, So Naturally It's A Tebow Thing
The backup quarterback is always more popular than the starter because he is an unknown quantity; he theoretically could be better than the starter. Tim Tebow is not an unknown quantity. We know exactly what his strengths and weaknesses are. His strengths include things like "being a teammate" and ...

Your Sunday NFL Open Thread
Here is your designated spot to yak it up about all things football. For instance, you can talk about the myriad ways the Browns will piss away a two score lead to the Giants. Just an example....

Are You Ready For Some Stock Footage Of Cheesesteaks And Pierogi?!: Your NFL Early Games Viewing Guide
Let's just all take a moment to reflect on—holy shit, it's week five already. It's possible your team is on bye already, which, my God I'm so sorry. The season just started but pretty soon it's going to be week 12 and then week 17 and then before you know it you're 65 and dead. Like that. ...

The NFL Is Pissed At The Titans' Defensive Coordinator For Talking Like A Coach
On Thursday, Tennessee Titans defensive coordinator Jim Jerry Gray made the following comments to The Tenneseean:...

Daily Screencap Classic: J-E-S-T JEST JEST JEST
The 2-2 Jets, mired in a trench of poor quarterback play and idiots screaming for Tebow, added to that the reeling feeling of learning Santonio Holmes would be missing the rest of the season....

Nike's New NFL Uniforms Are Too Damn Tight: "It Looks Like You Ate A Small Baby"
It's got to be tough for NFL offensive linemen, whose entire vocation, at least more than any other position on the field, is dependent on how much they weigh. If you're skinny, you won't ever be an offensive lineman. It's their duty to stay as large as possible, for the sake of their livelihood. Pr...

LeSean McCoy Sort Of Confirms That He Says His Last Name While Juking People
On Monday, we brought you the story of Eagles running back LeSean McCoy's supposed catch phrase. Today, we received an email from Robert Edwards of the Gloucester County Times that adds a bit more credence to the story:...

The Replacement Ref Disaster Was The Most Watched <i>Monday Night Football</i> So Far This Season: Last Week’s TV Ratings, In Context
A weekly feature wherein we contextualize TV ratings for national sports broadcasts. Data via Nielsen and Sports Business Journal's John Ourand. Viewership numbers represent approximate number of persons tuned to a given program; ratings share refers to the percentage of all households using a telev...

What's Wrong With The New Orleans Saints (And Can We Blame This On Sean Payton, Too)?
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Wes Welker And Deion Branch Were The "Bitches" Who Caught Tom Brady's Ire Last Sunday
Tom Brady was involved in one of the best GIFs of Week 4 when he was caught on camera saying "Fuck you, bitches" after running for a four-yard touchdown. But no one was able to discern who the "bitches" were. The Buffalo Bills? The fans in Ralph Wilson Stadium?...

Dan Snyder Used To Stay In The Owner's Box Until 4 a.m. "Pounding Drinks" And Stuffing His Face With Fast Food
ESPN the Magazine has a fun story out today about Dan Snyder and our old friend Dave McKenna. It presents a slightly friendlier portrait of Snyder than you might find on, say, Deadspin—where we've called Snyder a "prick" and a "churlish little shitbag vulgarian" but never once accused him of fellati...

Jets Sign A Receiver Who Called Them "Overhyped" Last Season
To make up for the loss of Santonio Holmes, the Jets added receiver Jason Hill today, per Brian Costello of the New York Post. This is the same Jason Hill who called the Jets "overhyped" last season....

"TEWBOW AT QB," And More Fan Suggestions To Improve The Jets
The Jets are in trouble. Their last game against the 49ers was an embarrassing 34-0 rout. Mark Sanchez passed for 103 yards. The Jets' next game is Monday night against the Texans, and the team has to improve. So someone on the Jets' Facebook page came up with the idea to ask Jets fans for help, see...

The Two Common Fallacies That Explain Why NFL Coaches Punt On Fourth Down
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