Gentlemen (And Ladies), Start Your Burritos

Since the burrito is the official food of Deadspin, we couldn't end the day without reporting on this. The Costa Vida World Burrito Eating Championship is set for Saturday in Portland, Maine, and you do not want to miss this classic faceoff. The colorful stars of burrito eating tend to put their hot dog counterparts to shame.

Sonya Thomas of Virginia — who is known in the world of competitive eating as the Black Widow — returns to Maine for the Costa Vida World Burrito Eating Championship after setting the 2005 lobster-eating record in Kennebunk, where she polished off 44 in 12 minutes. Her competitors include Tim "Eater X" Janus of New York, fresh from a Sept. 1 tamale-eating victory in Texas; and Chip "Burger'' Simpson of Alabama, Tim "Gravy" Brown of Chicago and Jason "Crazy Legs" Conti of New York.

It's clear that in a contest such as this, the ... wait, what? Did they say "Crazy Legs?"

Of course on the romantic side, how can one resist a woman who is known as the Black Widow, and who set the 2005 lobster-eating record in Kennebunk? After all, I'm not made of stone.

As always, mothers with infants wrapped tightly in white blankets are encouraged not to attend.

Burrito Battle - Professional Eaters Take On Costa Vida's Big Kahuna [Keep Me Current]