Hank Steinbrenner Is Just Boiling Over With Ideas

Pity the poor New York media. (A group in which, it occurs to us with a start, we are about to be considered a member.) They're so wistful for the old days of George Steinbrenner that they're desperately trying to shoehorn son Hank, the slow one, into the role. It's not working.

Our fellow , and great thinker, has decided that because pitcher Chien-Ming Wang was injured running the bases, the National League should take on the designated hitter.

“My only message is simple,” Steinbrenner said in Tampa, Fla. “The National League needs to join the 21st century. They need to grow up and join the 21st century.”

Steinbrenner said he was angry and added: “I’ve got my pitchers running the bases, and one of them gets hurt. He’s going to be out. I don’t like that, and it’s about time they address it. That was a rule from the 1800s.”

Oh, Hank: Where do we start here? We look forward to your next calculated, Steinbrenner-esque "rant," in which you rail against the single-ear-protector batting helmets ("What if my guy falls backwards and lands on the wrong side?"), those darned new teams ("The mountain air is awful for my outfielders' sleep apnea") and role-specific relief pitching ("Whatever happened to the ambidextrous robot pitchers? They need to grow up and join the 22nd century.")

Steinbrenner Rants On National League [New York Times]