Hockey Page 553 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Bobby Hull and Ivan Provorov don’t need you to defend them
The way we relate to professional athletes is a funny thing. They come into our homes via the TV weekly, nightly, and sometimes even hourly. In the fleeting few moments, we see them off the field (or ice, or diamond, or pitch), they are typically friendly, jovial, and serious about their profession,...
Good riddance, Bobby Hull
Bobby Hull was a terrible person. Most athletes can outrun or outskate that with what they accomplish on the field or ice. But even though Hull was one of the best hockey players of all time, the monster he was in his everyday life should shine through his accomplishments. He is no symbol of anythin...
The NHL isn’t for you
Once the NHL let one through the door, it stood to reason that another would follow. After the Flyers’ Ivan Provorov refused to wear their Pride Night jerseys in warmups, and their coach John Tortorella refused to admonish him in any way (nor did the official partner of the NHL in these matters, the...
L.A. Kings, Pacific Division prove why overtime and the shootout are a plague upon society
The idea that the NHL regular season is just an 82-game preseason is maybe the last vestige of a time when 16 of the then-21 teams made the playoffs. These days, when exactly half the teams are culled, some genuinely decent teams don’t make it. Teams like the Knights last year can rack up over 90 po...
The Vancouver Canucks are the worst
For an organization that has spent almost its entire existence accomplishing nothing, the amount of noise the Vancouver Canucks generate is certainly outsized. Three lost Stanley Cup Finals is the sum of their 53-year existence, and yet it feels like the drama they create always seeps into the great...
Pair of NHL brothers face off for first time, share penalty box minutes
The Joseph family had a memorable Friday night as P.O. Joseph of the Pittsburgh Penguins and brother Mathieu Joseph, playing for the Ottawa Senators, faced off for the first time as NHL players. Mom and dad were in the stands for the game for the occasion, and as only brothers can do, got put in tim...
Here are our NHL midseason awards
Handing out awards in the middle of the season is always a little silly, because just about anyone can spasm 40 games of brilliance. But hey, we’re here to be silly! So it feels like a great time to go over the first half of the NHL season and see who is the leader in the clubhouse for the baubles h...
Ron DeSantis is going full Florida Man on NHL diversity job fair
Florida governor Ron DeSantis’ obsession with anything that is of interest to minorities or marginalized groups has gone past disturbing. In his worldview, the only discrimination that matters is anything that benefits disadvantaged communities. The newest target of his anti-woke diatribes is the NH...
Someone tell the Avalanche the season started a few months ago
Maybe Nathan MacKinnon is going to have to ban everyone from drinking soda again. Or let them drink soda, whatever isn’t what they’ve been doing this season. ...
The New York Rangers have gone back to what worked, but kind of didn’t work, but they’re winning so screw you, New York numbah 1 baby
As the New York Rangers lurched and stumbled their way to the conference finals last year (two seven-game series to get there, and needing the Penguins to dress up the beer guy as a goalie to get by them. And a farting beer guy!), it was harder and harder to convince anyone that they were all smoke ...
Alexander Ovechkin, the 'GR8 One'
Alexander Ovechkin is the best pure goal-scorer in NHL history. That’s not up for debate. The longtime Washington Capital hasn’t been hockey’s best player for years, but his ability to put the puck in the back of the net is nearly as good as it was 15 years ago when he scored 65 goals during the 200...
Here come the Pens again, falling on our heads like a memory
The NHL season has been invigorated by some surprise teams and new blood announcing themselves as either contenders now or soon to be. The New Jersey Devils sit atop the Metropolitan by open lengths, redefining what the Devils mean as a whole with their obscene amounts of speed and skill. The Dallas...
Is it time to say hello to the Kraken?
It was wholly unfair to the Seattle Kraken that they had to be the expansion team to follow the Vegas Golden Knights. The Knights warped everyone’s view of what an expansion team should be, reaching the Stanley Cup Final in their very first year. The Knights took advantage of a swath of moronic NHL ...
Bruins get a finger in the wind and then jammed in their own eye
As far as public statements go, this one rings pretty hollow:...
We’ll never be rid of the Bruins
The Boston Bruins will never be considered anything close to a dynasty. It’s probably sobering for Bruins fans how close they are to being one, if anything can actually be sobering for Bruins fans. Had Zdeno Chara hit the other side of the post in Game 1 against the Hawks in 2013, and if Brad Marcha...
The Buffalo Sabres are… fun? Is that what this says here? That can’t be right
You know you’ve gotten things unfathomably wrong for an unfathomably long time when you are held up as an example of why teams in any sport shouldn’t rebuild. That was always the call when a GM was threatening to tear it down from paranoid fans and media alike. “Look at the Buffalo Sabres! They’ve b...
Maple Leafs have no bottom
I am as guilty as anyone else of turning the NHL into “How The Maple Leafs Turn.”You spend enough time commenting on how everyone’s always commenting on the Leafs, and well, you’re then part of the problem. But every time the Leafs do something, it’s generally causing some sort of ripple given their...
Phil Kessel is still here, more than anyone else has been
Phil Kessel has never been here for your shit. Which might be one of the reasons he’s going to break the consecutive games streak by playing in his 990th straight game tonight for Vegas....
The NHL’s investigation into the allegations against Ian Cole are a joke
Warning: This story includes allegation of sexual coercion of a minor and may be disturbing...
It’s going really well in Vancouver
Nothing goes right for the Vancouver Canucks. This is an immutable law of hockey and the NHL. It’s mostly comedy fodder for everyone outside of British Columbia, and probably for more sadistic jokes within. It becomes less funny when you’ve spent a decade or two listening to Canucks fans bemoan thei...