NHL Page 700 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Murray Season, Fire!
The NHL Closer is written by the five horny gentlemen from Melt Your Face Off. We accept tips in the form of Krispy Kremes, Pappy Van Winkle whiskey and whatever powder comes off Lindsay Lohan's C-notes....
Sean Avery Might Be The NHL's Most Compelling Idiot
Say what you will about the Rangers' Sean Avery, but in an NHL devoid of any discernible personalities, he's definitely becoming the most entertaining to non-puckheads. Courtesy of FanIq comes these two Avery gems, one before and one after his whole bizarre stick waving incident with Martin Brodeur...
The Ducks Aren't Licked Yet
The NHL Closer is written by the five delightful gentlemen from Melt Your Face Off. When not writing for MYFO and commenting on Deadspin, the fellas enjoy spending time listening to songs that are a trip with a funky beat that they can bug out to. Enjoy....
Do Protective Cups Even Help Any More?
In Saturday's 5-4 loss to the Capitals, the Flyers' Patrick Thoresen attempted to block a shot with his body and ended up getting drilled with the puck. But, unlike the thousands of other times this occurs during a hockey season, Thoresen got hit with the puck right in the peach basket, which dente...
Introducing Your New, Healthier NHL Closer
Greetings. Weed Against Speed here. With Wyshynski gone to The Exclamation Point, my fellow editors and I at Melt Your Face Off are proud to take the reins of the NHL Closer for the rest of the Playoffs. Don't worry. There will still be hot chicks in little clothing....
When Your Fans Blow ... Up Their Cups
The NHL Closer is written by Greg Wyshynski, of FanHouse and The Fourth Period. He is also the author of Glow Pucks And 10-Cent Beer....
Today In Silly Political Wagers
In case you forget, people, gambling is a sin, but that doesn't stop our politicians from insisting on those dopey city "wagers" anytime their teams play in the postseason....
Two Cheers, One Boo for the Elderly
The NHL Closer is written by Greg Wyshynski, of FanHouse and The Fourth Period. He is also the author of Glow Pucks And 10-Cent Beer....
NHL POST-VIEW: NHL Awards, Facts And Fiction
With the regular season over and done, NHL Closer writer Greg Wyshynski hands out the hockey hardware — officially and unofficially....
NHL Playoff Preview: The Threes Meet the Sixes
NHL Closer writer Greg Wyshynski previews the 2008 Stanley Cup Finals right up until they drop what is commonly referred to as "the puck."...
The Ones Meet The Eights
NHL Closer writer Greg Wyshynski previews the 2008 Stanley Cup Finals right up until they drop what is commonly referred to as "the puck."...
NHL Playoff Preview: The Twos Meets The Sevens
NHL Closer writer Greg Wyshynski previews the 2008 Stanley Cup Finals right up until they drop what is commonly referred to as "the puck."...
Stanley Cup Preview: The Fours Meet The Fives
NHL Closer writer Greg Wyshynski previews the 2008 Stanley Cup Finals right up until they drop what is commonly referred to as "the puck."...
Gleefully Crushing Playoff Dreams
Since tedious analysis is the stuff of "power rankings," each Monday NHL Closer writer Greg Wyshynski uses a form of universal expression: Success in terms of beer. Before we get to the hockey equivalent of a girly slap-fight, welcome to The Brewmeister Ratings......
The Golfing In Vancouver Is Lovely
The NHL Closer is written by Greg Wyshynski, of FanHouse and The Fourth Period. He is also the author of Glow Pucks And 10-Cent Beer....
Can You Smell The Sidney/Ovie In The Air?
The NHL Closer is written by Greg Wyshynski, of FanHouse and The Fourth Period. He is also the author of Glow Pucks And 10-Cent Beer....
The Playoffs Will Bend Your Wookie
The NHL Closer is written by Greg Wyshynski, of FanHouse and The Fourth Period. He is also the author of Glow Pucks And 10-Cent Beer....
People Who Aren't Allowed To Touch Stanley This Year
The NHL Closer is written by Greg Wyshynski, of FanHouse and The Fourth Period. He is also the author of Glow Pucks And 10-Cent Beer....
Heroes, Villains And Hockey Hookers
Since tedious analysis is the stuff of "power rankings," each Monday NHL Closer writer Greg Wyshynski uses a form of universal expression: Success in terms of beer. Before we get to hookers clearing Sean Avery's good name, welcome to The Brewmeister Ratings......