How Not To Beat A Drug Test

Respectable journalist (and apparent blog reader) Jon Heyman of Newsday was the first person yesterday to break the news of baseball's new steroid agreement yesterday, so our eyebrows raised when we saw, in his column today, him point out a specific Web site one of his sources says is vital in helping players avoid steroid detection: NeonJoint.com. We'd never heard of this site, and, after checking it out this morning, we realize that we'd never heard of it because we're the type of person who gets up before, say, 2 p.m.

The idea that this site is somehow run by drug-test-beating masterminds seems, well, a bit dubious. The site is less about beating steroid tests and more about how to make sure you don't freak out while tripping on acid. Helpful hints on what to remember while on drugs include:

No. 4. Taking your clothes off will draw attention. No. 9. Nobody can tell that you are tripping till you tell them "I'm tripping." No. 10. No matter how fucked-up you think you are, you'll eventually come down.

We're still looking for the section that tells us how to disguise "the clear." We're having no trouble finding out the variety of uses for hemp, though.

An Unsightly Site Remains [Newsday] NeonJoint [Official Site]