Human Gronk Wants To Ride Horse Gronk

Rob Gronkowski, a 6-foot-5 steed who loves to gallop real fast, has purchased a minority stake in Gronkowski, a 6-foot-5 steed who loves to gallop real fast.

Gronkowski, a 3-year-old colt, is scheduled to run in the Kentucky Derby on May 5. He’s won his past four races, including a first-place finish at the Burradon Stakes in March.

The Wall Street Journal got a quote from the football-playing Gronk, who knows he can’t sit on the horsie but definitely really wants to:

In a telephone interview, Gronkowski said he plans to meet his new horse in Louisville, Ky., a few days before the Run for the Roses.

“I’ve never dealt with horses,” he said. “Hopefully I can get a ride on the horse.”

When it was pointed out that a football player listed at 265 pounds might be too heavy for a horse that typically carries a 115-pound jockey, Gronkowski admitted he has a lot to learn.

“That’s what I want to know,” he said. “I’m not trying to ride it for a full speed ride. I just want to get the feel of what it’s like to be on top of one. Maybe I’ll go for a full speed ride once I get comfortable.”

When reached for comment, the horse Gronk flapped his lips while he displayed an enormous boner.

[ Wall Street Journal]