It's So Hard To Say Goodbye To Gatorade

The fancy schmancy Gatorade dispenser that has adorned the home dugout at Wrigley Field this summer is being removed and replaced with a boring old water cooler. Why? Because people can't be trusted to have nice things.

Both Ryan Dempster and Carlos Zambrano took shots at the machine this season, with Zambrano famously taking a bat to the poor thing after getting ejected from a game last week. So either the maintenance crew couldn't fix it or the team is worried the bright orange cover is just too shiny for their struggling players to focus on baseball, but in either case the machine is gone and some guys might not be taking it too well.

"That cooler is coming home with me," Ryan Theriot said. "Me and the cooler have a good relationship.

Whoa, let me stop you right there, Ryan. Don't ask, don't tell, okay buddy?

Cubs say their goodbyes to Gatorade dispenser [Chicago Tribune]