I've Been Drunk For Two Weeks

Supermodels are beautiful girls, Will. A beautiful girl can make you dizzy, like you've been drinking Jack and Coke all morning. She can make you feel high full of the single greatest commodity known to man - promise. Promise of a better day. Promise of a greater hope. Promise of a new tomorrow. This particular aura can be found in the gait of a beautiful girl. In her smile, in her soul, the way she makes every rotten little thing about life seem like it's going to be okay. The supermodels, Willy? That's all they are. Bottled promise. Scenes from a brand new day. Hope dancing in stiletto heels. If you would like to like to mash snow, then you're ready to be a Deadspin advertiser. Go here to find out more. This week's Martys: • Becks •Hotflops •Mike's Election Guide •Starwood Hotels • TiVo, •T-Mobile • Unscrew America