Jackass Columnist Blames Pitcher For Choosing Childbirth Over Pitching

I'm not a local, so I don't know how much of Dallas Observer columnist Richie Whitt's schtick might be part of his on-air radio personality, but I'm still going to bring your attention to this gem of a column:

Don't look now, but since Josh Hamilton's dumb dash for home Tuesday in Detroit, the Rangers are 1-4 and tied with the Angels atop the AL West. They start a three-game series with the Angels tonight in Arlington.

In Game 2, Colby Lewis is scheduled to start after missing his last regular turn in the rotation because — I'm not making this up — his wife, Jenny, was giving birth in California. To the couple's second child.

Don't have kids of my own but I raised a step-son for eight years. I know all about sacrifice and love and how great children are.

But a pitcher missing one of maybe 30 starts?

( Thanks to Hardball Talk for finding this, and Speed's got the full FJM treatment should you need it.)

So anyway, yes, that's the gist. Lewis, who returned home to California last week to be with his wife for the birth of Elizabeth Grace, returned to the rotation last night. He got beaten up for four runs in five innings and was tagged with the loss, which was a change of pace from his missed start, where the fill-in left with a lead. Remember, both were baseball games in April.

Needless to say, Whitt compares Lewis unfavorably with Shane Battier, who hit the game winner in San Antonio Sunday while his daughter was born back home. Personal choices and all that, but I'm not sure Lewis would trade.

All in all, Richie Whitt scores a disappointing 3.4 Whickers on the National Standardized Whicker Scale.

Welcome Back to Earth, Texas Rangers. Welcome Back, Colby Lewis? [Dallas Observer]