Joe Burrow’s New Haircut Will either Be Best or Worst Thing He’s Ever Done

Cincinnati Bengals star quarterback Joe Burrow reported to training camp with a new look.

He buzzed off his hair and seemingly bleached it, channeling his inner Slim Shady before the start of this NFL season.

Cincinnati will hope that the real Burrow will please stand up. But that’s enough with the Eminem puns for now.

It’s a pivotal year for the Bengals. Wide receiver Tee Higgins will be playing on the franchise tag and will be a free agent next season. Ja’Marr Chase is due for a contract extension, and that probably will not happen before the season begins.

If the Bengals are good, notoriously cheap owner Mike Brown will have to extend Chase at a minimum. The Bengals already made Burrow the highest-paid quarterback in NFL history, and they might have to break another record to keep their star wideout in Queen City.

Burrow’s haircut plays a role in this. He’s still just 27 years old, but he's coming off of a very unique hand surgery. The good news is, he’s completely cleared for training camp.

And he’ll need to really ramp things up because there’s a lot of pressure on these Bengals. The AFC North is loaded. The Baltimore Ravens are really good. The Cleveland Browns are coming off another playoff berth, and added Jerry Jeudy. The Pittsburgh Steelers somehow made the playoffs without a quarterback and added two better ones this offseason.

If “buzzcut Burrow” balls out, he looks like a genius. If he plays poorly and struggles in the division, he might look dumber than the game where Baker Mayfield shaved his face three times in the same day.

Burrow can’t be Houdini (you had to know that I wasn’t done with Eminem puns, right?) and completely disappear when the Bengals need him most. After playing just 10 games last year, Zac Taylor is going to need him on the field. 

Throughout his career, Burrow is 7-11 in AFC North games; he’s far from Superman in the NFL’s most difficult division. He’ll need to be much better, because if this division is as good as we all believe it will be, it’s possible that only one team is left out of the playoff picture.

If it’s Burrow’s Bengals that miss the playoffs, Higgins will be cleanin’ out his closet. Chase’s future could come into question. The days of viewing Cincinnati as a serious title contender in the AFC could slip away just as fast as they arrived.

But that’s life in the NFL. You have to capture the moment and capitalize on the opportunities when they present themselves.