Kobe Bryant Bravely Declares He Will Not Be Dunked On By His 14-Year-Old Campers

Tommy Craggs|published: 07/13/2009, 1:50pm EDT

The most appalling thing about the Nike Politburo's coverup of the LeBron dunk tape? Kobe Bryant, the league's foremost expert in the painstaking self-cultivation of one's image, gets to look sort of cool by comparison. Sort of.

Remember that it was Kobe who alerted Dwyane Wade to the dunk and who encouraged him to "give [LeBron] stuff about this." And now here, via The Baseline, is video of Kobe at his own camp, saying:

I'll tell you one thing: You ain't dunking on me in my camp.

To which the campers responded with a loud, sustained, "Ooooh." Look at what you've gone and done, Nike. You've made LeBron look like a glowering corporate pout, and you've allowed Kobe — work-doin', self-mythologizin' Kobe Bryant — to pretend to be some puckish blithe spirit, which he most definitely isn't. Lame. Of course, it should also be noted that Kobe was speaking to what appears to be a gym full of 14-year-olds, who, let's be honest, probably haven't dunked on anything not made by Nerf.

Video: Kobe "You Ain't Dunkin' On Me At My Camp" [You Been Blinded] Kobe Weighs in on LeBron's Missing Dunk [The Baseline] Kobe Leads 'Free Jordan Crawford' Charge Against LeBron [FanHouse]