Locker Page 419 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Turkey Misses Mark
“Everyone wanted to get out of the car because they were afraid of the turkey,” said John Tarabocchia, dispelling any uncertainty about the scariest part of a driving a very fast car into a flying turkey. Not the blunt surprise of impact, or even the minor cuts the family suffered from flying windsh...

James Harden Should Probably Take Some Time Off<em></em>
James Harden did not have a very good game against the Warriors last night, despite finishing with 24 points, 13 assists, and 11 rebounds. Move down the box score a bit, and you’ll see that he was 5-of-20 from the field and 1-of-9 from three-point range. What was to blame for the rough shooting nigh...

Carlos Correa's Dog Has A Lovably Dumb Face
Astros shortstop Carlos Correa has an unbearably cute puppy; this is not a drill. Groot looks like some kind of husky, and he enjoys chasing soft grounders....

Would You, Personally, Kill Assad?
The modern world is full of people who love to proclaim that they would have killed Hitler. Okay, sure, sure. But what would you do now? ...

James Johnson Did A Dunk Murder
The Miami Heat’s James Johnson dunked on Marcus Morris so hard in Tuesday’s game against the Pistons that Morris’s twin brother Markieff probably felt it, too....

Maybe Don't Trade Players To Your Closest Conference Rival
Former Nugget and current Blazer Jusuf Nurkic smacked around his former team with 33 points and 16 rebounds last night. It was a career night for the 22-year-old big man, and one that all but assured his team will be going to the playoffs while the Nuggets sit at home and smart. But to say Nurkic ki...

Jusuf Nurkic Shattered The Nuggets' Playoff Hopes And Roasted Them Afterwards
Before the Nuggets flipped him to Portland for one of the Plumlee twins, Bosnian big man Jusuf Nurkic was averaging 17 disgruntled minutes and eight points a game. Since the trade, he’s started almost all of Portland’s games and has nearly doubled his stats across the board as the Blazers have stead...

God Help Me, I Don't Like The New <i>Legend Of Zelda</i> Game
Breath of the Wild, the latest installment in Nintendo’s beloved Legend of Zelda series, has received basically universal acclaim since its release back at the beginning of this month. If the still-early reception were to crystallize today, it would go down as one of the most widely and ecstatically...

Adam Silver Wants To Ensure A Woman Becomes An NBA Head Coach "Sooner Rather Than Later"<em></em>
This afternoon, the NBA launched its annual gender equality campaign with Lean In. They released several videos promoting the organization, and commissioner Adam Silver spoke with ESPN’s Ohm Youngmisuk, Lean In founder Sheryl Sandberg, and Kathleen Behrens, NBA president of social responsibility and...

Kettle Chips Flavors, Ranked
Kettle Chips are the finest chip (potato division) that one can find at almost any grocery or convenience store. What sets the mighty Kettle Chip apart from the standard potato chip is its heft and wide range of flavors on offer. Which flavors are the tastiest? Here is a semi-exhaustive guide to the...

Deadspin Up All Night: I'm No Fool
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. Time to go run. ...

Joakim Noah Is Refreshingly Honest About His PED Suspension
Here’s something different: A professional athlete refusing to participate in the usual post-PED bust ritual self-mortification that only serves to prevent us from grappling with any meaningful questions about drugs and sports....

What To Do When An Old Friend Wants You To Join A Pyramid Scheme
Have you ever gotten a weird phone call from your home area code? Or maybe someone you used to know randomly invites you over to dinner, mentioning something about a business opportunity. These are sure signs that someone is trying get you involved in a pyramid scheme, and that’s bad, because pyrami...

White Sox, Continuing Rebuilding Effort, Trade Peter Bourjos<em></em>
It’s no secret that the Chicago White Sox are more focused on the future than the present, and so it’s no surprise that the battle for their center field job—one of spring’s major storylines—has ended with veteran Peter Bourjos moving on to a team that hopes to contend. The Tampa Bay Times’ Marc Top...

The Las Vegas Raiders Are Screwed
The Raiders are moving to Vegas and are getting the most expensive stadium in history out of it in the process, but who exactly in gonna visit this monstrosity, especially on a Sunday, with no gambling allowed inside the joint? And how is this all a poorly veiled scheme to help enrich Jerry Jones? T...

This Is All You Need To Know About Paul Ryan's Tax Plan
Boyish scamp and retrograde class warrior Paul Ryan is turning his attention to “tax reform,” a term of art for the process of moving our nation’s wealth into the bank accounts of the very rich. Here is one statistic that tells the entire story. ...

Suddenly, The Cavs Are Trash
For the first time in over a year, the Cleveland Cavaliers are no longer the top seed in the Eastern Conference. That honor belongs to the Celtics for the moment, after the Cavs got rocked by the Spurs in San Antonio tonight. Cleveland has looked like ass from the ass factory since the All Star brea...

Russell Westbrook Did It All In Thunder's Fourth-Quarter Comeback Win
The Oklahoma City Thunder went on a 14-0 fourth-quarter run to beat the Dallas Mavericks on Monday night, 92-91. Human lightning bolt Russell Westbrook scored 12 of those 14 points—including the game-winner with seven seconds left....

Paul Heyman Says Kaddish In Preparation For Goldberg's Death At Brock Lesnar's Hands
Paul Heyman’s WWE Raw appearances remain the best reason to tune into pro wrestling on Monday nights, and the longtime Brock Lesnar valet tonight previewed a presumed imminent death for rival Goldberg at Sunday’s Wrestlemania by saying Kaddish....
