Locker Page 492 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
CBS's Brian Jones Rants Against Targeting Rule
Brian Jones failed out of the NFL due to injury—he even filed, and lost, a lawsuit over it—but don’t tell him that the sport of football needs rules to protect players’ long-term health. The CBS college football analyst alternately demanded players grow eyes in the back of their head or barked “KEEP...
Beer Titties Metal
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A Tuscaloosa <i>College GameDay</i> Sign Roundup
ESPN’s weekly native advertising broadcast known as College GameDay set its temporary roots in Tuscaloosa today for the big aTm-Bama game. People brought signs, yes, and they also had signs in Lexington where SEC Nation was broadcasting its superior program....
Draymond Green's Taekwondo Skills Are Already In Midseason Form
Draymond “The Human Vasectomy” Green, whose reputation is rooted in his kicking ability as much as it is his actual basketball skills, is back at the martial arts-ing, even in preseason. Here he is last night against the Blazers, leveling his big foot toward Allen Crabbe:...
Rudy Gay To George Karl: "Welcome To Basketball Hell"
The Sacramento Kings, a failed state of an NBA team run by a clueless owner, will be bad this year, despite internal expectations that they’ll make the playoffs. One of the reasons why they could actually improve this season is because their new coach Dave Joerger seems to have a clue, unlike George...
Deadspin Up All Night: Smelling Good
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. Let’s go....
The Best Runners To Coach Are Middle Schoolers<em></em>
What I do at the middle school is generously called cross country coaching. To the untrained eye, our program looks a lot like goofing around, like BS, like a waste of time. I’m pretty lucky to be able to pull this off....
Big Bear's Ready For Bed
It’s almost winter, and that means it’s almost time for our ursine friends to begin hibernating. But before packing it in for a few months, each bear needs to achieve a status of total comfort and total fatness....
An Ode To James Carville's Super Fucked-Up Glasses
This election has turned the country into a tar pit from which we will never escape, but it did give us one thing that has brought me great joy. That thing is political pundit James Carville’s busted-ass spectacles....
Today's Internet Outage Looks Like A Giant Dong
Internet outages are penetrating the coasts today after hackers orchestrated a DDoS attack on the servers of Dyn, a domain name hosting service. It’s also a huge dick. Nice....
Hindus And Trump Rallied Together In A Xenophobic Fever Dream
Grab a plate of good, oily pav bhaji and watch a well-loved Indian movie star perform for thousands of immigrants. He greets the crowd in Tamil, jokes about jet lag, shimmies, and shimmers in the hallucinogenic stage lighting; the crowd squeezes as close as security will allow. Then watch as presid...
Animal Watch: Have Animals Escaped Our Control?
You can scarcely turn on the news these days without being confronted by the troubling question: What are animals doing now? ...
BYU Pick-Six A Masterful Display Of Avoiding Tackles
Fred Warner picked off a Brett Rypien pass and returned it 59 yards to give BYU its first touchdown of the night against Boise State, and he did so with so much flair it required a lengthy replay review—one that, eventually, upheld the play....
Wikileaks: Clinton Campaign Considered Having Her Make A "Yo Mama" Joke
Here’s a good one from the Clinton email leaks. Before a February campaign event in Birmingham, Al., a Hillary Clinton campaign staffer wrote a “Yo mama” joke into the speech, one which was eventually cut....
L.A. Sparks Win WNBA Finals After Insane Final Two Minutes
The Los Angeles Sparks took down the mighty Minnesota Lynx in a wild Game 5 this evening to win the franchise’s third championship. The last two minutes of the game were an incredible back-and-forth affair; Lindsey Whalen tied it up at 71 with 1:47 left, then Nneka Ogwumike gave the Sparks the lead...
Is Eric Trump A Lemonade Thief?
The latest scandal out of Donald Trump’s campaign: Possible lemonade theft. It appears that Eric Trump, one of his five children, put lemonade in a water cup at an In-N-Out burger, which the restaurant frowns upon....
Deadspin Up All Night: Blood Is Thinner
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. Plenty of good blogs still to come....
Donald Trump's Donation Ticker Is Actually Just A Sample File On Loop
Take a trip over to DonaldJTrump.com, and you’ll be greeted by the nice, prominent donation ticker you see above. The implication, of course, is that all these people have just added their name to Team Trump—and you should, too! Except that, at least according to the site’s source code, those “donat...
Yelling Is Pointless<em></em>
Drew Magary’s Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday during the NFL season. Email Drew here. Buy his book here....