Locker Page 597 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Every NYC Romantic Comedy Is Full Of Shit In The Exact Same Way
Our first mistake was going to see this thing when we did. A friend and I stumbled into a showing of How to Be Single after a few glasses of wine a few days after it hit theaters—the same weekend Deadpool opened. Our theater is a small one a few blocks away from my apartment in Williamsburg, Brookly...
Kobe Bryant Makes Another Fan Look Like An Awkward Schmuck
Kobe Bryant has been a kindler and gentler version of himself during his farewell season, and it’s been a little hard to understand how Kobe could suddenly stop being a vicious, hypercompetitive maniac. I’ve developed a groundbreaking new theory, though, that explains how Kobe’s been able to maintai...
Welcome To The Lance Stephenson Experience
The trade-deadline acquisition of Lance Stephenson represented a wager by the Grizzlies that he was misused and underused, that they would be the ones to figure out how best to deploy him effectively, something no one’s been able to figure out since the Pacers. ...
Steph Curry Bails Draymond Green, And The Warriors, Out
The 1995-96 Chicago Bulls’ 72 wins are so impressive because it is very easy for the nightly grind of the NBA to trip teams up. Sure, injuries can easily cause losses, but so can scheduling quirks, off nights, opposing stars going off, or a million other things....
Deadspin Up All Night: All This Obscenity
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Is Steph Curry Making Other NBA Players Worse?
Steph Curry is a bloodless assassin who could shoot your eyelashes off from a mile away and is destroying the rest of the NBA by nailing shots from near-mid-court on a regular basis. He’s a fucking freak of nature, but is his uncanny long-range ability rubbing off on lesser NBA players (****cough co...
I Surrender To My Paunch
There’s the dime-sized scar from the chicken pox that I scratched at until it bled, the thickets of hair that shot out of my skin when I was ten, stretch marks raking down at the sides from cutting, bulking, cutting and bulking. I am always aware of the way this finger-deep layer of fat and water hi...
James Harden's Partnership With Dwight Howard, Summed Up In One Play
Years from now, while surfing Basketball Reference, your child may look to you and ask, “How were the 2016 Rockets so bad despite having both James Harden and Dwight Howard? Weren’t those guys good? I must know the truth.” You will have prepared for this moment, and you will turn the eyes of your pr...
Who's Responsible When A Couch In The Road Causes An Accident?
Welcome back to Ask a Lawyer, wherein I, a lawyer, respond to your questions. Got a vexing legal issue? Send it over, or drop it in the comments below....
Aaron Gordon Is A Nasty In-Game Dunker Too
If the first time you really noticed Aaron Gordon was when he was jumping over a dragon on a hoverboard during the dunk contest, that’s okay! The Orlando Magic aren’t very good, and Gordon hasn’t quite managed to consistently put together his elite potential (though he’s close). The important thing ...
Deadspin Up All Night: The Hot Sun
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Who Fires A Dog?
“Pack up your desk, Fido. You’re out.”...
<i>Fox Sports Live</i> Relaunches; Spends Most Of Time Mocking Show's Low Ratings
Fox Sports 1 relaunched Fox Sports Live tonight in hopes a revamped format might spark the highlight show’s inexplicably bad ratings. What we got instead was hosts Jay Onrait and Dan O’Toole in a miniscule studio repeatedly mocking the previous incarnation’s failures with their signature brand of Ca...
Kyrie Irving Says He Got Bed Bugs At A Supposedly Haunted Oklahoma City Hotel
In the course of beating the Oklahoma City Thunder last night, the Cleveland Cavaliers stayed at the Skirvin Hilton, a hotel supposedly haunted by a maid who committed suicide decades ago. But the slamming doors and bathtubs mysteriously filled with water that have plagued other NBA teams were the l...
Rory McIlroy Made Shane McMahon Disappear For Five Years
Remember this guy? We’re pretty sure his last TV appearance was being the first to congratulate Rory McIlroy on blowing the 2011 Masters with a round of 80, nearly five years ago. Shane McMahon returned to Raw tonight, where we learned the CEO’s son will be taking on The Undertaker at Wrestlemania. ...
Deadspin Up All Night: Nothing Is Wasted
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This Dion Waiters Lowlight Reel Is Very Rude And Very Funny
Remember the Dwight Howard lowlight reel that was just as funny as it was mean? The person who made it has blessed us with another video, this one celebrating Dion Waiters’s 1-for-8 performance against his former team on Sunday. ...
The Pistons Are Voiding A Three-Way Trade, And It Has Hilarious Consequences
One of the “bigger” NBA trades from the snooze-fest of a trade deadline was a three-way deal among Detroit, Houston, and Philadelphia. This is how the trade looked: ...