Locker Page 647 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

How To Talk To White People About Blackface
As the inevitable Halloween Week avalanche of white people caught in blackface has begun, we present, for your information, my keynote address at October’s Secret Global White People Meeting....

You're Gonna Trash Your Halloween Costume, So Here's How To Clean It
On this episode of the official Ask a Clean Person podcast, The Hairpin’s Haley Mlotek joined me to talk all about the very best day of the year: Halloween! The Hairpin has a storied history of going in big for Halloween, and so it was such a joy to have Haley join me in the studio to talk about cle...

<i>The Wild Bunch </i>Is Still Nasty, Unrelenting, And Pretty Goddamn Great
Imagine being alive in 1969 and going to see The Wild Bunch when it was new. It was released in an era when American movies were changing, and when audiences were getting more and more used to seeing gruesome violence onscreen, like in Bonnie & Clyde. Granted, it was still a time when movies would t...

Dasvidanya
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¡Es Insano! Timbers Advance In MLS Playoffs After Breaking Physics In PKs
Portland Timbers are moving on in the MLS playoffs after defeating Sporting Kansas City in a wild match that required eleven rounds of penalties—with the winner being scored by, and then saved by, Timbers keeper Adam Kwarasey....

Mark Cuban Is Still Incredibly Heated About The DeAndre Jordan War
Over the summer the Dallas Mavericks thought they had signed DeAndre Jordan, only for him to renege on his verbal commitment and re-sign with the Clippers. The NBA schedule-makers—ever the delightful trolls—gave us a national TV Mavericks-Clippers game for the Clippers’ home opener, and reporters na...


Deadspin Up All Night: In My Dreams
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. What a lovely day....

Austin Rivers Might Be In Trouble For Hitting A Fan With A Seat Cushion
Clippers guard Austin Rivers, the NBA’s Draco Malfoy, is reportedly being investigated by the league after allegedly hitting a fan with a seat cushion during last night’s game against the Kings....

I Could Whoop At Least One Loudmouthed Sports Blogger
On Wednesday, Samer Kalaf typed what may well be his last words....

You Should See the 3D Sex Drama <i>Love</i>, Even If You Hate Gaspar Noé
There are two very understandable reasons why people hate Gaspar Noé’s films: He’s a pompous tool, and his movies are often little more than showy provocations filled with vapid ciphers. If anything, Love finds the 51-year-old director doubling down on his self-appointed enfant terrible persona, and...

How To Crash A Party Like A Pro
Yesterday, the New York Times’ Ben Widdicombe wrote about a vilified archetype of NYC nightlife: the Party Crasher. These are wily revelers who show up uninvited to the kind of high-brow parties that are usually thrown by rich wannabe celebs and big, bougie brands. The story gives examples of some o...

Thabo Sefolosha Opens Up About The Night The NYPD Broke His Leg
Atlanta Hawks wingman Thabo Sefolosha made news on April 18 when he was arrested along with his teammate Pero Antic at 1 Oak, a nightclub in New York, and charged with resisting arrest, disorderly conduct, and obstruction of governmental administration....

Football Is Not Family
Drew Magary’s Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday during the NFL season. Email Drew here....

People Are Paying For Coffee Made From Poop
In news that is old to much of the world but very new and alarming to me, there is a type of coffee out there called Kopi Luwak that retails for $168.95 per bag and is processed by feeding coffee beans to a civet—a kind of Indonesian woodland creature—and then letting the beans pass through its stoo...

Jeb Can't Fake A Spleen; The GOP Can't Fake A Candidate
You ask a five-year-old to pretend she is a grownup doing a grown-up job, and she will furrow her brow into a stern expression, scrunch up her little mouth into a tight frown, and speak in a deepened, scolding tone of voice. It does a pretty good—and cute!—job of illustrating how a five-year-old per...

Andrea Bargnani Shoots An Air Ball, Nearly Kills His Coach
Thank God for Andrea Bargnani, the most hilariously inept player in the NBA. Here we are, just one game into the new season, and he’s already blessed us with another fantastic addition to his career lowlight reel....

Rick Ross Did An Adele Remix For Some Reason
Rick Ross heard Adele’s new song “Hello,” and he felt it so hard that he just couldn’t help himself. So he dropped a remix. ...

How To Deliver A Devastating Elbow Strike, According To An Ex-Navy SEAL
Retired Navy SEAL Clint Emerson conducted special ops all over the world for 20 years, attached to the NSA and the now-famous SEAL Team Six. He learned some highly specialized skills along the way, and he’s now collected them into a fast-paced, pocket-guide entitled 100 Deadly Skills: The SEAL Opera...

Chris Christie Flips Out On Debate Question About Fantasy Football
Things got testy multiple times at last night’s GOP debate, with the candidates repeatedly going off on the CNBC moderators for asking what they perceived to be biased or inane questions (even as they generally failed to provide substantive answers to the substantive questions). Toward the end, thin...