Locker Page 810 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Sacramento Kings Deny Dealings With Disgraced Wingnut Dinesh D'Souza
Disgraced '80s relic/wingnut Dinesh D'Souza, having pleaded guilty to violating federal campaign finance law, is currently living in a halfway house as part of his probation. This probably makes it difficult to promote his new movie, America: Imagine the World Without Her, which one reviewer describ...
Here's The Deep-Thinking, Super-Alcoholic Beer For You
When last we Drunkspun, we were so angry at Stella Artois for sucking that we completely overlooked the fact that we don't even need the good Belgian beer around anymore. We were so busy praising all the good Belgian beer, lest we look ugly and ungracious by failing to properly appreciate their ce...
Get On The Jake Gyllenhaal Bandwagon Now: <em>Nightcrawler</em>, Reviewed
1. Why don't we talk about Jake Gyllenhaal more? This is an actor who...
Candy Corn Is Garbage
Many people like candy corn, such as hobos, serial murderers, and Satan. But actually, candy corn is terrible. If you give it out to trick-or-treating children this evening, you belong in fucking prison....
And Now, Your Worst Halloween Costume Stories
We were living in Chicago when I was six, and I chose to be a ghost for Halloween. I made the costume myself, because cutting two holes in a sheet seems like an easy task. Of course, I had to cut a third eyehole, because my first two were off-alignment. I also failed to consider the fact that a...
Russell Westbrook Will Be Out A While
Already without Kevin Durant for an extended time, the Thunder are going to have to survive without Russell Westbrook, who is expected to miss at least a month after fracturing a bone in his hand last night....
Steve Ballmer Comes On Strong With The Embarrassing Dadness
Clippers owner Steve Ballmer was doing his Steve Ballmer thing throughout his team's home opener, but the highlight of his hootin' and hollerin' came right after the final whistle, when Ballmer wielded his daddish intensity (dadtensity) to embarrass and frighten his son, as all good dads know how to...
Rappers And Cats: A Complete History
Meow the Jewels is a real thing. What started as a joke—with Run the Jewels, the acerbically bombastic rap duo of EL-P and Killer Mike, offering to re-record their fantastic new sophomore album, Run the Jewels 2, with "nothing but cat sounds for music" if someone gave them $40,000—has bloomed into...
At Least LeBron Had Fun
LeBron James seemed determined not to blame—or maybe, not to acknowledge—that nervousness played any role in his uncannily rough game in what he had called earlier in the day "probably one of the biggest sporting events ever."...
Russell Westbrook And Fan Scream At Each Other
Russell Westbrook exited the game at the Staples Center Thursday night after he fractured his hand on Kendrick Perkins's elbow while fighting for a rebound. But while walking back to the locker room to get it examined, the TNT cameras picked up Westbrook getting into a heated exchange with a fan. ...
Taylor Swift's <i>1989</i> Proves That "Pop" Doesn't Mean Anything Anymore
These are trying times to find oneself still riding for Taylor Swift, the Artist. As a celebrity, as a mostly willing punchline, as a cultural nemesis, as a content generator, she's never been bigger or better—this week alone, she's made cat noises, continued stalking her own fans on social media,...
Mediocre Power Forwards Are Beefing Because Josh Smith Can't Shoot
The Denver Nuggets beat the Detroit Pistons 89-79 Wednesday night, behind Kenneth Faried's 22 points and 17 rebounds in a hyper-efficient 28 minutes. But after the game, he mostly wanted to talk about why the Pistons lost the game. Specifically, because of Josh Smith:...
Ew
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Scientific Proof Gatorade Is Better Than Powerade
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BAH GAWD, KING, HE DROPPED HIM WITH THE SUPLEX
That's an offensive player!...
The Full Cleveland Cavaliers Intro & Starting Lineups, With Proper Audio
TNT (or, perhaps, Quicken Loans Arena) had a major audio fuckup tonight that left the Knicks' radio feed bleeding all over the Cavs' carefully-crafted fancy intro. So here's that fancy intro and starting lineups with proper audio....
Deadspin Up All Night: I'm Not Based Today, That's The Day I Bleed
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. Let's go....
Anyone Want This Timberwolves Ticket? No? OK.
This photo, taken by Reddit user SmoothWay, appears to show a free ticket, face value of $40 or so, for tonight's T-Wolves home opener, if anyone wants it. Does anyone want it? Has it been taken yet? Is there any excitement for a team that has the last two No. 1 picks? Surely someone is at least int...
Kobe To Dwight Howard: "Soft Motherfucker, Bitch-Ass Nigga"
It was plainly clear that Kobe Bryant called Dwight Howard "soft" while shit-talking his former teammate on opening night, but now, thanks to an intrepid Instagram user who was sitting courtside at the game, we know that Kobe also called Dwight a "bitch-ass nigga."...
