"Megatron's Butthole" To Remain Clenched

When we last checked in on the progress of the Atlanta Falcons’ new stadium, which features an eight-petal retractable roof known as “Megatron’s Butthole,” things were stopped up. The Atlanta Journal Constitution brings us an update today, and it looks like the hole will remain closed for some time.

The AJC reports that construction delays have prevented the roof from being fully mechanized, and that it will have to remain closed when the Falcons start their season in September. As for when the un-clenching might begin, well, it could be awhile:

He said it typically takes 40 days to “mechanize” such a roof after its last “construction move.” Since three more construction moves of the roof are scheduled in the coming weeks, the 40-day clock won’t even begin until after those moves. And Cannon indicated the process could take longer than 40 days because it will be sandwiched around a heavy schedule of events in the stadium.

Congrats to the city of Atlanta, which agreed to fork over $200 million for a stadium that can’t even get its giant robot butthole to function.