Parents Name Baby Wrigley Fields. Seriously

Look, if you didn't want your kid to amount to anything in life, you could have just stamped the word LOSER on his forehead in indelible ink; or left him on the doorstep of Green Party headquarters. But Paul and Teri Fields of Michigan City, Indiana just had to get creative, and so they decided to name their newborn son Wrigley. So that would be, Wrigley Fields. Sweet fancy Jesus in a chariot.

Wrigley Fields was born Sept. 12 at LaPorte Hospital and into a family of devoted Cubs fans. His middle name is Alexander. "Usually, you're only born a Cubs fan. You don't turn into one," said Paul, who was born and raised in Michigan City. "I'm a big, big Cubs fan." The Fields don't plan to use any shortened nicknames for their son, although Paul acknowledges that he could be teased during school.

Yes, if by teased at school you mean this.

Also, mom looks a bit like the mother from Malcolm in the Middle. Strike two, little guy!

(Photo by Chicago Sun-Times)

15 Years Later, Wrigley Fields Is Born [CBS5]