Soccer Page 243 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Canada Has Its Own Wonderteen And Bayern Munich Just Paid $13 Million For Him
Bayern Munich have completed a deal today with the Vancouver Whitecaps for the MLS team’s 17-year-old winger, Alphonso Davies, effective at the January transfer window after he turns 18. The German giants will pay $13 million for Davies up front, with various bonuses kicking in if the young Canadian...
Bayern Munich President Brutally And Inexplicably Owns Mesut Özil
Germany and Arsenal midfielder Mesut Ozil announced his retirement from international soccer on Sunday, citing racism from fans, criticism of a photo he took with Turkish president Recep Tayyip Erdoğan, and unfair scapegoating by German’s top soccer officials. For no obvious reason, Bayern Munich pr...
Liverpool's B-Team Came To America To Get Smacked Around By Christian Pulisic
Wonderteen Christian Pulisic willed Borussia Dortmund to a 3-1 victory over Liverpool in the International Champions Cup on Sunday, in front of 55,447 of his countrymen in Charlotte. The 19-year-old subbed in at halftime with his team down 1-0 and promptly took the game over. ...
Mesut Özil Quits International Soccer In Letter Decrying Racism And Unfair Double Standards
Mesut Özil retired from German international soccer Sunday, in a lengthy statement released on Twitter. Özil says the fallout from a photo he took with Turkish president Recep Tayyip Erdoğan in May lays bare a kind of racism he’s subjected to as a German with Turkish heritage, and that “enough is en...
LAFC's Adama Diomande Says Portland Timbers Player Called Him The N-Word During Game
LAFC striker Adama Diomande wrote in an Instagram post that an opponent on the Portland Timbers called him “the ‘N’ word” during his team’s U.S. Open Cup match on Wednesday. Diomande came on in the second half as a substitute in his team’s 3-2 win, and while he exchanged a few words with Timbers pla...
Soccer Player Blows Off Some Steam By Drop-Kicking Opponent In The Stomach
Sometimes, in the late stages of a certain loss in a big game, a soccer player might boot the ball with an unnecessarily strong kick in an effort to physically expel some of their inner frustration. No problem, you see it all the time. Less common—and less forgivable—is deciding that your discontent...
France's Game Plan In The World Cup Final Was Just "Give It To Kylian Mbappé"
Throughout the World Cup, 19-year-old Kylian Mbappé showed why he was worth over $200 million to PSG last summer, displaying his unique blend of speed and skill to overwhelm the living hell out of his opponents. Though still very much a teenager, he was France’s focal point on the attack, serving as...
![Way-Too-Hardcore Toronto FC Supporters Started A Fire In Their Opponent's Stadium [Update]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/qoyvxjsdl3e4pooa3ze9.gif)
Way-Too-Hardcore Toronto FC Supporters Started A Fire In Their Opponent's Stadium [Update]
Some Toronto FC fans went fucking buckwild tonight during their Canadian Championship semifinal match against the Ottawa Fury. The most passionate part of Toronto’s supporters section—where dudes start chants and others wave ridiculously large flags—ignited a casual fire, burning the flags they were...
Liverpool Spend Truckload Of Money To Prevent Further Loris Karius Boners
Liverpool are rolling in Champions League cash after that surprisingly successful 2017-18 campaign, and they’ve proven yet again that they’re not shy about spending it. Today the Reds appear to have completed a deal with Roma for the Brazilian goalkeeper Alisson, paying the hysterical price of €75m ...
Arsène Wenger: Oh God, What Was I Doing At Arsenal For The Last 22 Years?
Pretty much the entire back half of manager Arsène Wenger’s 22-year tenure with Arsenal could be forgotten with little consequence. After winning a couple titles and then going unbeaten in the 2003-04 Premier League season, Wenger’s accomplishments quickly thinned—a mix of third- and fourth-place fi...
Reporter Hit By Falling Railing On Opening Day At D.C.'s New MLS Stadium
D.C. United celebrated the opening of their new stadium last Saturday. Fans were treated to 32 minutes of Wayne Rooney, protests from disgruntled supporter groups, and a series of railings breaking and falling all over the place. D.C. United communications VP and sideline reporter Lindsay Simpson wa...
Announcing Cliches In Soccer, Ranked
The World Cup didn’t quite feel the same without Ian Darke to call it, but at least there was another month of (mostly) British announcers populating our soccer broadcasts. Here’s a celebration of the phrases only heard when watching the beautiful game....
Croatia's World Cup Final Run Was A Miracle
As a rule, small countries do not play in the World Cup final. Only 13 countries on earth have ever even made the final, and aside from one of Sunday’s participants, only big countries have played for the cup in the modern era. It’s been over 50 years since there was a final that didn’t feature one ...
Donald Trump Pauses Historically Embarrassing Press Conference To Toss A Soccer Ball At His Wife
Donald Trump just finished up a joint press conference with Russian president Vladimir Putin, during which he has stopped just short of offering to lay down on the stage and suck Putin’s toes. He also interacted strangely with a soccer ball before bouncing it in the direction of his wife:...
Paul Pogba Bossed The World Cup
Kylian Mbappé’s rifle-shot goal that put the World Cup final firmly in France’s grasp was a fitting flourish on what had been a tremendous tournament for the 19-year-old prodigy. If France’s run to glory was paced by one player, it was Mbappé, whose reality bending runs and lethal finishing elevated...
Everton Really Fucked Up This Fifth-Division Team, 22-0
Everton decided to take on a fifth-division Austrian team, ATV Irdning, ostensibly because they were the closest 11 sentient beings in the area. The offseason friendly took place in Austria, where Everton have a training ground in picturesque Bad Mitterndorf, a few miles up the road from the home...
France Topple Croatia In Hectic, Exhausting World Cup Final
A hilariously wild and ragged World Cup final concluded with a 4-2 victory for France, after a chaotic first half marked by a pair of dumb goals for France, and a second half marked by a Pussy Riot field invasion and maybe the dumbest goal you will ever see in a World Cup Final, from Croatia....
Belgium Topple England In Sweet, Satisfying Third-Place Match
Belgium topped England in a loose and entertaining third-place game Saturday, behind a couple terrifying quick-strike counterattack moves, and some delightfully screwy defending from the lads of England....
Tennis Player Gets Pegged With Ball, Pays Tribute To Neymar
Wimbledon always hosts a number of goofy exhibition doubles matches involving former players. Mostly these are excuses to showcase the racket hijinks of the spectacularly mustachioed Mansour Bahrami. But in a match yesterday, there was one point in which he somehow did not steal the show. Instead, t...