7 Page 86 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Sad Sixers Make Sad Pizza Deal Even Sadder
In October, Papa John's announced one of those standard promotions they run where if the Sixers win a game, fans get 50 percent off their pizza. They've wisely changed that threshold to "if the Sixers score 90 points, even in a loss."...

The Philadelphia 76ers Are A Godless Abomination
You almost certainly missed it over the weekend, but the Philadelphia 76ers made a big addition to their roster, scooping up free-agent forward Robert Covington. If you've never heard of Robert Covington, that's because he's an undrafted second-year player who had previously seen the floor in just s...

Where Every NBA Team Takes (And Gives Up) Shots
Here's a chart by our friend Ed Kupfer, who does analytics for the Houston Rockets, showing the distribution by percent of every NBA team's offensive and defensive field goals. If you take a second blink through the information overload, it's a shorthand Rosetta Stone for what's going on in the NBA....

Michael Carter-Williams, Professed Non-Tanker, Tanks
The 76ers are a sorry excuse for a professional sports franchise. Last season they had the second worst record in the league. During the draft this offseason they had two top-12 picks, and chose to take a guy that has a season-long injury and a guy that is going to play in Europe this year. They'v...

Don't Threaten Me, Fox Sports Florida
Send stories, photos, and anything else you might have to [email protected]....

Nerlens Noel Stuffs James Harden, Shits In The Graves Of His Ancestors
James Harden went for a buzzer-beating dunk to end the third quarter tonight in Philadelphia. Nerlens Noel had something to say about that. Specifically: "Fuuuuuuck no."...

What Was This "God Bless America" Performance?
We assume MSgt. Jennifer Sherman is who she says she is, which puts her a step up from previous "God Bless America" singers. But her interesting take on the seventh-inning showtune left the nation a bit baffled:...

The 76ers Do Not Even Care Who Is On Their Team Anymore
The Philadelphia 76ers currently sport a roster that appears to be made up of guys who were spat into the world by NBA 2K15's player creator. According to the team's official site, the Sixers got a little more unreal today, as the team apparently signed 43-year-old power forward Bo Outlaw, who retir...

Zach Mettenberger Looks Ready, Titans Fans
Your new starting quarterback looks like a winner, or a man about to make a scene at Mapco because they stopped beer sales. It's one of those....

NBA Shockingly Votes Against Anti-Tanking Measures
Today's vote on a proposal to re-weight the NBA draft lottery to discourage tanking was expected to pass with near-universal support. Instead, it fell hard, receiving only 17 of the 23 necessary votes for adoption. The 76ers' Tankapalooza is back on!...

Jesus, Have You Looked At The 76ers' Roster?
Just look at this roster. Look at it. ...

Moritz Stoppelkamp Scores Longest Ever Bundesliga Goal
Down 0-1 to Bundesliga newcomers SC Paderborn 07 in second half stoppage time, Hannover 96 keeper Ron-Robert Zieler went forward for a last ditch free kick. That proved to be an unfortunate decision, as Paderborn midfielder Moritz Stoppelkamp cleared the ball 83 meters into Zieler's net. Stoppelka...

Joel Embiid DMs 2K Sports Rep Seeking Better Video Game Ratings
As we have discussed before, Philadelphia 76ers rookie Joel Embiid is the best at Twitter. He continued to be the best at it last week, when he sent an unsolicited direct message to a member of 2K Sports' marketing team in an attempt to juice his stats in the upcoming NBA 2K15. ...

UFC Runs Disastrous, Embarrassing Card, Blames Fighters And The Media
On Thursday, UFC 177 was positioned to be a terrible pay-per-view event, just really bad by any objective standard. At the risk of being accused of doing what promoter Dana White calls "the most disgusting fucking despicable thing," I would have discouraged fans from purchasing it, if asked. It wa...

Boulevard Tank 7 Farmhouse Ale: Because Summer Ain't Over Yet
Seriously, look it up. Summer goes until late September these days, thanks to climate change or the revolution of the earth around the sun or some shit—vaccines, maybe, I dunno, I'm not a weather doctor, but I did get a calendar for Valentine's Day. ...
![If Hasheem Thabeet Sits Behind You In Coach, Don't Recline Your Seat [Update: Not Him]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/875011928917373582.jpg)
If Hasheem Thabeet Sits Behind You In Coach, Don't Recline Your Seat [Update: Not Him]
Update, Aug. 29: Hasheem Thabeet's publicist has reached out to say that couldn't be Thabeet in the photos below, as he didn't fly to Philadelphia in the timeframe in question (and doesn't own Beats headphone). Sorry folks. But still: don't recline your seat if there's a really tall person behind yo...

This Is The Best Hockey Goal You Will See All Day
OK, so this is also the only hockey goal you are likely to see today, but do you know what that changes? Nothing. You are watching 20-year-old Kloten winger Vincent Praplan turn Champions Hockey League opponent HV71 into his own personal Washington Generals. ...

76ers Ask NBA To Delay Anti-Tanking Measures Until They're Done Tanking
A couple weeks back, it was reported that the NBA was attempting to push through changes to its draft lottery system: a re-weighting of the odds that would discourage tanking. The Philadelphia 76ers would reportedly like the NBA to hold on a sec, because they're not finished being terrible....

News Anchors Reporting Plane Crash Can't Say "Ouagadougou"
Ouagadougou is the capital of Burkina Faso. It's also the origin of Air Algerie flight 5017, which crashed last week in Mali killing 118. With the disaster coming so soon after the MH17 tragedy, coverage of the crash in West Africa deserved high placement in local newscasts across the U.S.—and, in t...

WWE's "Russian" Characters Referenced The Malaysian Airlines Crash
On last night's WWE pay-per-view, Lana and Rusev, playing Russians—or at least Russophiles; they're not totally clear on the details— made reference to Americans blaming Russia "for the recent current events." ...