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"I Am Sorry If I Had Disappoint You": A Dialogue Between An Extremely Frustrated Gamer And <em>Madden</em> Tech Support
From tipster "Peter King" comes this transcript of his encounter with Electronic Arts tech support. Mr. "King" comes bearing questions about his online Madden league. Manish from tech support brings up a nonexistent "online pass." Relations deteriorate pretty quickly from there. Watch as our Madden ...

Should Brent Musburger Apologize For Calling John Carlos And Tommie Smith "Black-Skinned Storm Troopers" 44 Years Ago?
John Carlos and Tommie Smith, each raising a fist on the medal stand at the 1968 Olympics, have become an icon of that decade, and that climate, and of the changes that were a-coming. They're heroes now, but that the time they were seen by many as traitors, and agitators, and by at least one up-and-...

The Miami Heat's "Good Job, Good Effort" Kid As Heard Throughout History
He was there to tell Napoleon "Good job!" when the Little Emperor invaded Russia. He called the 1962 Mets season a "good effort." The young Heat fan who so enthusiastically endorsed his team's performance after last night's loss to the Celtics is no stranger to momentous occasions—in sports or oth...

Adrian Peterson Is Ranting On Twitter About America's Godlessness
Adrian Peterson is a great, great running back. This we knew. But we never knew before today that the young man was a budding Thomas Aquinas....

The Next Four Jerry Sandusky Jurors All Have Penn State Ties, Including Three University Employees
We remarked yesterday on the difficulty of finding jurors in Centre County, Pa., with no connection to Penn State, and so it has come to pass: Four of the nine picked yesterday have some tie to Penn State or to one of the witnesses likely to be involved. And three of the four chosen this morning (in...

It Takes A Special Kind Of Mom To Disown Her Child Over Voicemail
Once in a while, we're offered a glimpse into the dark heart of the American family. The above voicemail is one such instance. Reader Ben provides the background:...

Six-Year-Old Sends Brandon Jacobs $3.36 To Stay With The Giants
Brandon Jacobs is not what you would call a great running back. But that doesn't matter when you're six years old, and you attach yourself to a player for the least rational of reasons. Maybe young Joe saw Brandon Jacobs score a single touchdown on a particularly formative viewing day. Maybe Joe's p...

Why Do Players Choke? Oddly Enough, Because They Hate Losing.
The New Yorker poached science writer Jonah Lehrer from Wired, and what do you know? His second piece is sports, and it is timely. Lehrer seeks to explain the plague of every duffer and NBA superstar since the beginning of time: Why do we choke? Why do we freeze up under pressure? Why do things that...

Who Will Speak Up For The Victims Of Flopping? Jeff Van Gundy Will
Jeff Van Gundy was mad enough when Mickael Pietrus stuck Mario Chalmers with a bogus technical foul down the stretch of last night's Celtics-Heat Game 5. But then, as he fumes about the damage a single unjustly awarded free throw could do in a close game, he accidentally sends his partner Mike Bre...

There Are Two Relievers Who Are Doing Really Absurd Things Right Now
The Cincinnati Reds have played 54 games, officially one-third of their 2012 schedule. And the Angeles de Anaheim have played a few more games than that. We're at a point in the season when peculiarities morph into real, dependable success. That means we have no choice but to pay attention to Aroldi...
![How A Teenager With A Fake Escort Service Duped Darren Rovell And CNBC [UPDATE]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/17oy9pv00sq5dpng.png)
How A Teenager With A Fake Escort Service Duped Darren Rovell And CNBC [UPDATE]
An 18-year-old high school senior named Tim was bored one day last November when CNBC's sports biz guy, Darren Rovell, sent out the following tweet:...

Behold Shin-Kicking, An Actual Competitive Sport In England
Says The Daily Mirror: "The rules of shin kicking are very simple. Kick your opponent to the ground and you win. No throwing, tripping or pulling—the 'fall' must be precipitated by a kick to the shins." Very well....

Dwyane Wade Copes With Brutal Game 5 Loss By Wearing Stupid Glasses
First it was Russell Westbrook, and now it's Dwyane Wade rocking a pair of glasses without lenses in the postgame locker room. Wade may be a fashionable man, but you can't pull off this look after you got your ass beat. LENS-FREE GLASSES ARE FOR CLOSERS. I'm not gonna go as far as Yahoo's Dan Wetzel...

Yankees Tickets Are A Dollar, Seats Are Empty, And They're Trying To Blame StubHub
I'm going to tell you something, and then I'm going to ask you a question. The Yankees are having attendance issues. They aren't selling enough tickets, and for the ones that are being sold, they're being undercut by StubHub, which offers them for well below face value. Now the question: do you feel...

This Is What Trying To Drive A Golf Cart Along A Highway After A Wedding Reception Looks Like
You know how this goes: The reception's over and everyone in the wedding party is slowly but surely getting their shit together to get on the hotel shuttle, where the party will likely continue. But Saturday night, just south of Pittsburgh, a couple of Yinzers had other ideas....

One More Clueless L.A. Media Moment: "Kings Goalie Jonathan Swift"
The Stanley Cup itself will be at the Staples Center tonight, and the Kings look all but unstoppable. (Up 3-0, Kings merchandise is flying off the shelves, because L.A. is filled with more bandwagoners per capita than any other North American city.) You'd think by now the local media would have go...

Bristolmetrics: The Miami Heat Got More <em>SportsCenter</em> Coverage Than The Spurs And Thunder Combined
This is a regular feature breaking down, minute by minute, the content that appears on ESPN's 11 p.m. edition of SportsCenter throughout the week. Graphic by Jim Cooke....

For These Tennis Fans, The Score Is Love-Mouth
Here's a shot from Maria Sharapova's match a few days ago, during which some Roland Garros spectators appear to be engaged in some hanky-panky. Amour!...

"Good Job, Good Effort" Heat Fan Is The Best
He could be a super-passionate Heat fan. He could be the trolliest young Celtics fan in the history of everything. It doesn't matter tonight. "Good Job, Good Effort" Kid, we salute you....

Why Is No One Watching The Stanley Cup Finals?
It's not news that Stanley Cup Finals ratings are utterly abysmal, but here we are talking about them again because it's another year and the NHL has decided to hold another annual round of playoffs. Hooray for us, because the hockey has been really great! But not so good for NBC, which saw Games 1 ...