a Page 7417 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Here’s Jon Gruden Saying Weird Shit To Terrelle Pryor
If you missed the supplemental Gruden Camp episode for supplemental draft candidate Terrelle Pryor on ESPN last night, then what you essentially missed was public harassment on a national broadcast. In a nice way!...

At Least We Might Get Some Funny Nike Commercials Out Of The NBA Lockout
Dime takes a look back at the 1998 NBA lockout commercials. We have so much to look forward to, you guys. [Dime]...

Asafa Powell Beats The Clock, In Lieu Of Beating Usain Bolt
Asafa Powell, the 100-meter world record holder of the pre-Usain Bolt era, claimed the title of Fastest Man in the World, This Year, So Far by running a 9.78 yesterday in Lausanne, Switzerland. That beats the 9.79 that Tyson Gay ran in early June in Clermont, Florida, before Gay dropped off the circ...

Deion Sanders, Jr. Shaken Down For Attempted Chick-Fil-A Purchase
Deion Sanders Jr. is a highly touted quarterback prospect at Marcus High in Flower Mound, Texas, about an hour from Dallas. Having the name Deion Sanders may help him in this realm....

Stories That Don't Suck: SportsFeat's Guide To Schmuck Owners
Every Friday, SportsFeat picks a few great weekend reads for Deadspin. In honor of Frank McCourt, the lockouts, and James Dolan's never-ending flirtation with Isiah Thomas, here are five of the best stories ever written about terrible owners....

Ohio-Based Lady Sues Kobe Bryant For Not Marrying Her
Kobe Bryant has five rings. But now one litigious soul is livid that she didn't get one from him....

Today, The Mets Deposited The First Of 25 $1,193,248.20 Checks Into Bobby Bonilla's Bank Account
Bobby Bonilla is 48. He hasn't played for the Mets since 1999. He hasn't played in MLB since 2001....

Former First Round Pick Now Growing Marijuana, Hoarding Assault Rifle Ammo
We can not, repeat NOT blame the lockout for this one. Jose Ortiz, known as Piculín and revered as a hero in Puerto Rico, was busted this week at his home. Inside ICE agents found "approximately 218 marijuana plants" and 40 rounds of AR-15 ammunition. The criminal complaint, with photos, can be foun...

Cockblocked By Waves!
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase four heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....

Joe Paterno On Stroking And Big Kisses, Completely Out Of Context
Last night, ESPN hosted an hour-long feature called "'Difference Makers: Life Lessons with Paterno and Krzyzewski." The coaches talked about greatness and being great and the ways of the greats and how great it is to be great, and Rece Davis mentioned a few times that they were both quite great. I...

Jagr To Pittsburgh: Nope
Officially, the record will say the Penguins withdrew their 1-year, $2 million offer to Jaromir Jagr. But it's fairly safe to say that Jagr, who's had the deal in front of him for a few days, made it clear he wanted more. More money? More years? More of a chance at a Cup?...

LeBron James Dunks On Small Child To Stay Alive In Casual Game Of Knockout
LeBron James spoke at a basketball camp this week, and then he humored the young'ns by following up his missed jumpers with a few dunks — one of which knocked out a kid's lay-up and then knocked over the kid. Luckily for the camper, the initial embarrassment will ultimately evolve into the best pa...

Largest Sports Site Posts Messi Satire, Second-Largest Sports Site Parrots It As News
On Tuesday, Yahoo's soccer blog posted a seemingly innocuous article on Lionel Messi's loyalty to Barca. "When I eventually pass on, I will only play ghost football at Barcelona. I am happy there. No amount of spirit money will tempt me," he supposedly said....

Well, Shit, We've Been Giving The Norris Trophy To The Wrong Man Every Year
Your morning roundup for July 1, the day we blamed math on luck. Photo via Reddit....

Here's A Picture Of The Time Those Purple, Courtside Uggs From Miami Reappeared In All Their Glory
Tipster Josh has a story to share. So, listen up:...

This Wasn't The First Time Mr. Handy H. Wood Of Duncannon, Pa. Was Arrested For Exposing Himself
Handy H. Wood, 35, was charged with exposing himself to a McDonald's drive-thru clerk on May 17. Mr. Wood was also charged with exposing himself to a woman in the Giant/Rite Aid shopping center parking lot on May 29. Finally, Mr. Wood was arrested for exposing himself to a woman in another shopping...

Watch A Guy Drive Off The Side Of A Mountain
What happens when your car goes twirling off the side of a mountain at Devil's Playground during the Pikes Peak International Hill Climb? If you're Bobby Regester, you just climb out of the Pontiac Sunfire window. Ripoff....

The Payoff For Sticking Around To Watch A Pretty Cool Shot From Wimbledon Is A Whole Lot Of Grunting
Here's video from when Victoria Azarenka faced Tamira Paszek in the Wimbledon quarterfinals a couple days back. A quick check confirmed that a) Victoria Azarenka and Tamira Paszek are really the names of two tennis players, b) Azarenka won 1 and 3, and c) the Gruntin' Belarusian lost to Petra Kvit...

18-Year-Old Michael Jordan's Gibberishy, Cocky Love Letter To A Comely Lass Named Laquette
If only we had the grace and verve of Michael Jordan, we've often lamented, we could have been great basketball players. But that powerful desire never extended to love notes, when, clearly, it should have....
