a Page 7523 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

We Are All Dave McKenna LXV
Here's your daily link to Dave McKenna's brilliant "Cranky Redskins Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder," which we'll be posting until some really bad, unspeakable things befall Snyder's dumbass libel suit. Today's topic: The draft....

They Unveiled A Tim Tebow Statue In Gainesville Today
At the University of Florida's annual Orange and Blue spring game, bronze statues were unveiled in honor of the school's three Heisman Trophy winners....

Minor Leaguer Mercifully Cut By Indians Organization, Hits Million-Dollar Scratch-Off Ticket
Joel Torres still has major-league dreams despite being released by the minor-league Akron Aeros baseball team last month. He may have emptied all the luck from his tank yesterday, though, when he picked up a $660,300 lump-sum payment for hitting a $1 million "Sweet Millions" lottery ticket that h...

No Strikes, but One Out as Labor Unrest Hovers Over Video Games
For a brief moment Tuesday, I wasn't sure we'd be seeing any basketball video game this year, even though I'd taken for granted that NBA 2K12 would release, a death-and-taxes sure thing in October for more than 10 years.… [Kotaku] ...

Here's A Video Of Geno Auriemma's Girls Dropping It Like It's Hot
Inspired by the Sun Drop commerical, UConn freshman hoopsterette Stefanie Dolson gets her headband and groove on. (H/T Soxs and Dawgs)...

Your Masters Open Thread
Tiger Woods and KJ Choi are scheduled to tee off at 2:35 p.m., with Jason Day and Rory McIlroy to follow 10 minutes later. CBS coverage of the third day of the Masters commences at 3:30 p.m. If you can't wait that long, there's live coverage online, too....

The Dodgers Are Concerned Enough About Fan Violence To Offer Half-Priced Booze At Six Upcoming Games
The Los Angeles Dodgers have talked a good game in returning their stadium to something that doesn't resemble a gangland Thunderdome where opposing fans get beaten into comas for no discernible reason....

Here's Video Of Critics Of The Guy Who Sold The Sonics To Oklahoma City Getting Thrown Out Of A Costco
Starbucks CEO Howard Schultz went to the Costco in Issaquah, Wash. yesterday to autograph copies of his book "Onward: How Starbucks Fought for Its Life Without Losing Its Soul." Fans of the late Seattle SuperSonics found this ironic, since they consider letting their beloved basketball team leave ...

Canucks Supporters Video Might Have Elevated The Big Yankees Fan To Creative-Genius Status
Tipster Ian writes, "Since you have a link for a parody video for the Yankees, you guys gotta put this out there to get the buzz going for the start of the playoffs! Plus it's about the league leading team in almost every category, they have having an epic season and just in time for the real seas...

Even The Top Seed In The Playoffs Isn't Good Enough For This Expressive Bulls Fan
Your morning roundup for April 9, the day it became painfully evident that knowledge gleaned from the Old Testament and YouTube videos do not a professional at-home circumcisionist make....

109-Year-Old Woman Throws Ceremonial First Pitch Like A Girl
Today we salute Violet Smith, who celebrated her 109th birthday by throwing out the first pitch at opening day for the Great Lakes Loons on Thursday. We're impressed by her form — an overhand with a follow-through! — and by her being very much alive....

We Are All Dave McKenna LXIV
Here's your daily link to Dave McKenna's brilliant "Cranky Redskins Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder," which we'll be posting until Snyder's dumbass libel suit gets its teeth rapped in with a wrench....

"Got Rings?" T-Shirt Reminds Knicks Fans That Their Team Has Been Bad For Almost 40 Years
Yes, the Knicks have rings, this T-shirt declares. Two of them. From 1970 and 1973. And yes, the NBA store is charging its fans $20 to be reminded of the fact that they've hardly come close since. Available for purchase in orange or blue, shipping and shame not included. Via Bob's Blitz....

Jay-Z Fined $50k For Making Kentucky Freshmen's Dreams Come True
ESPN's Marc Stein reports that the NBA has fined the New Jersey Nets $50k for Jay-Z's visit to the Kentucky Wildcats locker room....

Fox 8 News Provided Us With Both Gloria James's Police Booking And On-Court Attack Videos Free Of Charge
Poor Gloria. Gloria just wanted her car, and Gloria just wanted some kid to foul her son like a considerate human being. We now have this Queen James highlight reel, thanks to the sharing souls at WJW Fox 8 News in Cleveland: Gloria's booking video at the Miami Beach Police Department, accompanied...

Manny Ramirez Has Retired From Baseball After "An Issue" With Its Drug Program
Bill Shaikin of the Los Angeles Times reports that after the MLB alerted Tampa Bay's Manny Ramirez to "an issue" under its drug program, the two-time world champion chose to retire "rather than continue with the process." [@BillShaikin, ESPN]...

Bad Beats: Handicapping An <i>American Idol</i> That Has Gone Horribly, Horribly Wrong
Hello, folks. Welcome back to Bad Beats, the column you visit for betting advice and sad tales of gambling woe. Read past Bad Beats here. Got any stories for us? Email us at [email protected]. Subject: Bad beats....

Brazilian Striker Neymar Does A Nice Bit Of Skill And Finishes With A Pass
Apart from the fact that The Spoiler has yet to spell his name correctly at the first time of asking (it's Neymar, not Naymer, you idiot), we're growing rather fond of the young Brazilian....

Wayne Rooney Curses And The World Heaves
Shrek got angry after scoring a hat trick against West Ham last Saturday and spat a few acrid words into the camera. Now Shrek will lose 250,000 squid and miss an FA Cup semifinal because some asinine arbiters of morality in sports have decided there's no cursing on the pitch....
