a Page 7529 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
We Are All Dave McKenna LIX
Here's your daily link to Dave McKenna's brilliant "Cranky Redskins Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder," which we'll be posting until Snyder's dumbass libel suit gets a good judicial colon cleansing. Today's topic: Charging people $15 to watch cheerleading tryouts....
What's Really Special About This Picture Is That Chipper Jones May Have Signed A 7-Inch Sperm Replica
The first weekend of baseball season wouldn't be complete without an "Atlanta Braves Chipper Jones Sperm Autograph" available to the highest bidder. As of 11 a.m., there were zero takers on the starting bid of $1. Fine, it's not authenticated, but this is still shocking when you consider that there...
The Detroit Lions Went Ahead And Emailed Their Pre-Draft Player-Visit Plans To Every Team In The League
If Commissioner Roger Goodell takes the stage and says, "With the 13th pick in the draft, the Detroit Lions select...," but nobody is watching, is it still totally embarrassing that everybody in the league already knows how that sentence is about to end? Tough to say. Lions fans are used to being s...
Fulham's Michael Jackson Statue Is More Frightening Than The Balloon Creatures From "The Wiz"
Fans of EPL team Fulham knew this day was coming for a little while. But, were they prepared for what greeted them at Craven Cottage today?...
If You Wanted A Think Piece About The "Hockey Luvin Homos," Puck Buddies Got Your Back
From the preeminent website "for boys who like boys who like hockey" comes a follow-up to this week's widespread discovery of Vancouver's front-row "Hockey Luvin Homos."...
Abusive Relationships Are The Talk Of New York Baseball
It's not enough for Yankees GM Brian Cashman to let the Mets wallow in the fact that they're the Mets. No, he just had to call them out for abusing "left-handed specialist" Pedro Feliciano last year....
Here's Video Of Derrick Rose Making Up For A Turnover With A Sky-High Blocked Shot
Derrick Rose, the Chicago Bull who LeBron thinks should be league MVP, made a very nice defensive play last night to prevent the Raptors from pulling within two points in the third quarter. Seconds later, he assisted on a three-pointer. And just like that, the Bulls were up seven. And just like th...
The Kentucky Wildcats Refused To Go Down Without A Fight Or An Internationally-Televised Nut Tap
Your morning roundup for April 3, the day it became clear that 16-year-old girls at meth labs hope you have rabies....
In England, They Just Wrap Your Head Injury And Send You Back Out On The Pitch
Early on in today's Arsenal/Blackburn match, Samir Nasri (of the former) went head-to-head with a foe (from the latter)....
Your Final Four Open Thread
In the evening's first Final Four game, the Virginia Commonwealth University Rams tip-off against the Butler University Bulldogs around 6:09 p.m....
Invisible Line Helps Oregon Win A Sub-NIT Championship
The Oregon Ducks won the College Basketball Invitational tournament (presented by Zebra Pen) last night. The CBI's "history page" goes all the way back to 2008 and notes how VCU won it last year....
The Nationals Extend Their Lead In The Spelling-Fails Sweepstakes
First, they got John Lannan's name wrong on the scoreboards during introductions. Then, they were "honoriing" the heroes of 9/11. Now comes word that the Washengtin Natchonulls broadcast partner shouted outfielder Laynce Nix out as "Lance Nix" on MASN, per tipster James, who offered photographic ev...
A Sad Cubs Fan Has Questions About Wrigley Field Rules Pertaining To Obese Cubs Fans
Tipster Andy from Waukesha, Wisc. has a question. Here it is: "I am watching the Cubs pregame and behind the hosts is a HUGE guy, I don't think I've ever seen someone that big let alone sitting in a stadium seat. How does this work? What about the people next to him? So many questions but this make...
We Are All Dave McKenna LVIII (Busted Piñata Head Edition)
Here's your daily link to Dave McKenna's brilliant "Cranky Redskins Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder," which we'll be posting until Snyder's dumbass libel suit is smashed to bits to the point that all the pieces of Vero, Pulparindo, Pelon Pelo Rico, Duvalin and Canel's fall to the ground....
This Nine-Year-Old Kid Might Well Be The World's Next Greatest Soccer Player
This lad, who has yet to be publicly identified, is being called "The Japanese Messi." For good reason. The kid's got footwork, pace and panache to the point where the guy who coached "The Real Messi" as a youth has linked to this clip via Twitter. Or, it could just be a farce, which would be sad....
Here's A Picture Of Alex Ovechkin With His Arm Draped Over The First Lady's Shoulder
Alex Ovechkin of the Washington Capitals titled this piece of artistry, "With the First Lady!" and posted it on Twitter yesterday. Awesome on so very many levels not the least of which is the availability of $25 cabernet, per the wall-mounted wine list. If this image doesn't warrant lifting the uns...
Dennis Rodman Recognizes The Importance Of Family
Your morning roundup for April 2, the day that the color starts returning to the knuckles of passengers and crew on Southwest Flight 812, the plane with a three-foot hole in its side....
Yet Another Reason To Hate The Midwest: This Guy's Cubs Favre Jersey
Tipster Mike eyed this tortured soul at the Wrigley Field urinal troughs during the Cubs-Pirates game today....
We Are All Dave McKenna LVII
Here's your daily link to Dave McKenna's brilliant "Cranky Redskins Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder," which we'll be posting until Snyder's dumbass libel suit is close-captioned in shut the fuck up....
John Salley Story Corner: A Teammate Has A Disgusting Hookup Failure Of His Own
Every week, John Salley, onetime Bad Boy and currently the arachnoid half of the Spider and the Henchman podcast, will regale us with an amusing and occasionally salacious story from his playing days. Today: an unnamed Georgia Tech teammate has an unexpected girl problem....