a Page 7956 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Prep Schoolers Up In Arms Over Plebeian Reporter Pointing Out That Their Crappy Football Team Sucks
The Sidwell Friends football team has been outscored 373-43 this season. When Washington City Paper columnist Dave McKenna pointed that out, he learned that the school's tony pansies are way feistier on the Internet than they are on the field....
Sundays Are Tough On You, Little Buckaroo
We want every Deadspin reader to see how much this Sunday's play of the week enrages, elates, or dejects you and your game-watching dude cluster. Pathetic and/or entertaining football reaction videos are what we're after, so get your preferred video recording device ready for this week's football co...
Wizards Owner Will Dougie If A Game Sells Out
Ted Leonsis promises to emulate John Wall's Dougie if the Wiz have just one sellout. A sellout is not like making the playoffs or Andray Blatche earning his contract; this is a doable thing. [Ted's Take]...
Cleveland Responds To The LeBron Commercial
Cleveland, or someone representing Cleveland who produces videos, is still really upset about LeBron James leaving for a state that has great weather and no state income tax, so they have put together this video response to James's new commercial....
You, Dim PR Person, Are Dumb And Should Be Fired, Part 5: Salisbury Edition
PR people are dumb. Not all of them, just some of them. Like this thoughtful individual repping "Voice America Radio" who forwarded us (and many, many sports-affiliated sites) this update on their new client — Sean Salisbury. Sigh....
Yankee Fans Are Completely Reasonable About Signing Derek Jeter
A lovable old man called in to New York sports talk radio to share his thoughts on what the Yankees should give Jeter in his upcoming negotiations. It's naive, and foolish, and probably a pretty accurate microcosm for the fanbase....
Cockblocked By A Salad-Tossing Cow!
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase four heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....
Last Night's Winner: The Zenyatta Bubble
Zenyatta, the undefeated 6-year-old mare who's getting the sort of soft-focus-and-tinkly-piano treatment we generally reserve for plucky little Olympic gymnasts and Bob Costas, is an 8-to-5 favorite in tomorrow's Breeders' Cup Classic, horse racing's true signature event. Bet against....
Jerry Rice Is Obviously Not The Best Football Player Of All Time
The way I see it, there were six players they could have named as No. 1 and no one could seriously object: Brown, Unitas, Payton, Montana, LT and Elway. They chose none of those. We're objecting....
Derrick Rose Does Something Point Guards Shouldn't Be Able To Do
Last night's Bulls-Knicks game was a scoring bonanza. While the Knicks prevailed, Derrick Rose had the highlight of the game: this Dominique Wilkins-esque slam that a wiry, 6'3" point guard shouldn't be able to do....
Is This The Machine Or An Imposter On The Tonight Show?
Click to view Brian Wilson took his routine to The Tonight Show last night and—among other things—introduced The Machine to the Jaywalking-loving audience (around the 3:30 mark). Either Pat Burrell gained weight, or we have a whole new mystery on our hands....
Someone In The Heat Organization Finally Decided To Stop The Assholery
That Ohio kid who wore a LeBron Miami jersey to an Indians game after The Decision? The Heat offered to fly him down for a game, until the public caught wind and someone decided maybe they don't need to celebrate jerks. Again....
Kevin Harlan Thinks The NBA Has A Four-Point Shot
Either that or he lost track of the score. The latter's probably more likely. [h/t Benjamin]...
C.J. Spiller Is Prepared For His First Buffalo Winter
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
The Truth Behind Those Terrible Texas Statues Is Sorta Revealed
Remember the terracotta-army-like statues that Texas threw up recently? Well, there's a sign now that explains that the statues are to honor specific people, but remain generic as statues. The old "it sucks on purpose" defense hasn't been this transparent since The Room....
Knifepoint Cunnilingus And A Fishy Scent
I don't want to spoil the surprise, but I really think you should check this out....
Report: Cam Newton Sought Cash For Commitment
This could be a big one. ESPN is reporting that someone claiming to represent Cam Newton as he made the jump from JuCo to FBS asked for money in the range of $200,000 to guarantee Newton's commitment. [ESPN]...
Mark Sanchez Fined For Body Language
The first victim of a policy he instituted, Sanchez was fined for non-verbally blaming a teammate for a practice mistake. Mark Brunell pockets the cash. I think Brunell isn't actually an employee, and he's just living on fines and buffet scraps. [Star-Ledger]...
Slow-Motion Video Of Popcorn Popping, Because Why Not
If you have ever wondered how popcorn is made, the answer is science. But here's a video that shows some really delicious science in action. [Modernist Cuisine, H/T Katie]...
Heat Strokes, Game 5: The Last Asshole Standing
FreeDarko's Bethlehem Shoals, a regular contributor to NBA FanHouse and co-author of The Undisputed Guide to Pro Basketball History (visit the FreeDarko store, too!), is keeping a game-by-game diary of the Heat's season — the one you're pretending not to care about....