a Page 8905 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
That'll Cost Mr. Fitty Some Crackers
• Did Larry Fitz make a baby with a Raiderette? Only time DNA will tell. [SportsByBrooks] • Eric Byrnes should probably tone it down a bit. [Nationals Enquirer] • Keeping tabs on the NFLers over in Wee Britain. Watch our for the Poppins. [The Sports Hernia] • A solid guide for those of you looking t...
Hugh II: The Nedessey Continues... Part 1
It's another glorious Saturday of football action all over America. Of course I'm sitting here following the games online and collecting your instant messages while I watch the Premier League on my DVR. Things sure do sound thrilling, so I'll be sure to catch the second halves of the early games (as...
What, No Facepaint?
For a franchise with such a short and unremarkable history the Carolina Panthers sure seem to attract an odd level of devotion. Most recently a curious young couple thought fit to devote their entire wedding ceremony to the team they love so much....
Parlay O' the Week
Amateur athletics and gambling go together like bacon and hot fudge. Each weekend I will share some of my valuable college football gambling wisdom with you, the reader. Just remember, most of said "wisdom" comes from years of losing ridiculously speculative bets; when you lose all your money don't ...
The One Day A Year I Wish I Was In Jacksonville
• 12:00 — Ponies: Breeders' Cup World Thoroughbred Championships [ESPN] • 12:00 — CFB: Michigan St. at Iowa [ESPN] • 12:00 — CFB: West Virginia at Rutgers[ABC] • 2:00 — Movie: The Fifth Element [TNT] • 2:30 — Movie: Psycho [AMC] • 3:00 — Movie: Bottle Rocket [HDNTM] • 3:30 — CFB: Clemson at Maryland...
About Last Night
What you missed while thanking the heroes... • NBA: Kevin Garnett's triple-double was too much for LeBron in a game that didn't count. Exactly how long do we have to wait for Garnett to get hurt? This whole Boston thing can't really work, Doc Rivers wouldn't let that happen. • MLB: There wasn't a ga...
Boston Now Controls Everything. Beware.
• The Red Sox went to the World Series and then started kicking some ass. • One happy Kentucky fan. • We'll call this an agent screwup. • Heath Shuler, still awesome. • Ack! Jason Taylor robot! • Here comes Dennis Miller. • Larry King explodes. • Channing Crowder is smart. • Sorry: Still not worth i...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch as, during the earthquake, you shake violently to make the room seem like it's standing still ... • College football: Boise State at Fresno State. Welcome to the Doghouse. [ESPN2] • Golf: Champions Tour, Charles Schwab Cup Championship, second round, Sonoma, Calif. They call us Funkhea...
Your Breeders Cup Preview
We only have space in our heart for one horse, so we can't get too much into the Breeder's Cup this weekend....
For Giants Fans, Crazy Is As Crazy Does
Sure the Red Sox have a bit of momentum going, and it looks like they're going to cruise to their second World Series title. That's because Colorado Rockies fans are relatively new at this. They don't understand that, when things aren't going your way, it's never too early to call in a bomb threat....
Hey Kids, It's The Giant Colon!
Seriously, the kids could spend all day playing in the giant colon. And they would, if the state capitol building didn't close at 4. Actually, the display is called "Super Colon and Friends," and is on display in Carson City, Nev., to raise colon cancer awareness. But I just call it fun! (Yes, I ha...
Who Will Win People's "Sexiest Fan Alive?"
AJ Daulerio's Cultural Oddsmaker runs every Friday. Email him to let him know what you think....
Attica! Attica!
We couldn't explain why we did the things we did. So we went to this psychiatrist who explained to us that we were a woman in a man's body. So Sonny right away wanted to get us money for a sex change operation: but where was he to get that? 2500 dollars! God, he's in hock up to his ears already....
The Video Game Version Of What You'd Look Like Playing Hockey
This is Shawn Chambers, who played 23 years in the NHL and won two Stanley Cups. He also has a more modern, odder distinction: He's the worst video game athlete in history....
Everybody's The Bad Guy
• Not that we can stand the Big Ten Network, but Comcast has a lot of blame in this whole deal too. [Clubber Lang's Basement] • Dude, Colorado, stop with the walks. [All On The Field] • We do find this Subway commercial pretty funny. [The Hater Nation] • Anybody in the NFL tanking so far? [Mr. Mitte...
A Look At Andre Iguodala
We're dangerously close to the start of the NBA season, with all its drama and months of madness. To us, part of the beauty of the NBA is that its focus, while ultimately on the team, falls on the individual. The plight of one player becomes an epic tale in the shadow of Jordan; who is the real alph...