abl Page 14 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Bill Belichick Is Sick Of Those Stupid Microsoft Tablets [Update]

Patriots head coach Bill Belichick, who has never been one to embrace technology, has had it with Microsoft Surface tablets on NFL sidelines. He went on a surprisingly long-winded rant about the devices in today’s presser, where he essentially said that the tablets suck ass and he’s not using them ...

Larry The Cable Guy Snapped A Dude's Arm While Arm Wrestling [Graphic]

Larry The Cable Guy, a comedian who’s made $50 million telling redneck jokes, is a huge Nebraska football fan. At the Huskers’ game against Illinois last weekend, this dude challenged him to an arm wrestling contest. He broke his arm like a Thanksgiving wishbone....

Urban Sprawl Or Housing Crisis? Neither, Thanks.

Urban sprawl is bad. Not having enough housing to meet demand is also bad. It now appears that reconciling these two things may be harder than we thought. But not impossible!...

How To Enjoy Coffee Even When It's A Thousand Degrees Out

Look, the weather is the most boring topic in the world, especially when it’s some asshole on the East Coast griping about it, but it’s hot. I can’t ride my bike, I can’t give my dog a good walk, I can barely breathe. I can, though, drink coffee. I’ve found the solution....

Table Tennis Is Impossible To Play Without Pulling Insane Faces, Apparently

Like I said, look at these faces....

Ping-Pong Is The Perfect Olympic Sport

Like the opening week of March Madness—the best part of that tournament—part of the joy of watching the Olympics is the overwhelming amount of action. At any point in the day, you can flip on the TV and take in a wide variety of sports and “sports,” and in the same way that the promise of happening ...

Pablo Cuevas Protested His Wimbledon Match Because He Wasn't Allowed To Pee

That’s Pablo Cuevas on the left there. He got mad and staged a protest at Wimbledon because the umpire wouldn’t let him take a pee....

Am I Committing Cable Theft? 

Welcome back to Ask a Lawyer, wherein I, a lawyer, respond to your questions. Got a vexing legal issue? Send it over, or drop it in the comments below....

Fat Joe Says "I Got A Story To Tell" Was About Anthony Mason

Music and sports fans alike have spent years trying to figure out the true identity of the unnamed New York Knick mentioned in Biggie’s “I Got A Story To Tell.” Bomani Jones and Dan Le Batard, hosts of ESPN’s Highly Questionable, have been particularly dogged in their pursuit of the truth, and today...

Pablo Sandoval's Short, Sad Season Is Reportedly Over

The Red Sox announced earlier today that Pablo Sandoval would undergo shoulder surgery, which I suppose settles whether he had a real injury or was faking it. According to a report from ESPN, Sandoval’s surgery will take him out for the rest of the season. From the report:...

ESPN Edited Curt Schilling Out Of An Airing Of The '04 Red Sox <i>30 For 30</i>, And People Are Mad

Four Days in October is an ESPN 30 for 30 series film that first aired in 2010. It aired again yesterday, in slightly edited format, and dopey Red Sox fans teamed up with dopey conservatives to form a coalition of derp in protesting what they believed to be a conspiracy against recently fired analys...

Congratulations Indeed

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Some Questions We Have About "Clothing-Optional" Pop-Up Restaurants

The Bunyadi, a “clothing-optional” pop-up restaurant coming to London this June, is not just a titillating concept a la Sex And The City’s Club BED or S&M-themed bar....

Report: The Giants Banned Hotel Room Service For Pablo Sandoval So He Wouldn't Overeat

While Pablo Sandoval remains on the disabled list for a shoulder strain that may or may not be real, the Red Sox third baseman’s relationship with food is being scrutinized. Comcast Sports Net’s Sean McAdam was on Toucher and Rich today and reported that when Sandoval was with the San Francisco Gian...

Report: Red Sox Happy To Pretend Pablo Sandoval's Injury Isn't Fake

Officially, Pablo Sandoval is on the 15-day disabled list with a strained left shoulder. Unofficially, and probably more accurately: Pablo Sandoval doesn’t want to sit on the Red Sox bench, and the Red Sox don’t want him around. These next four years are going to be great!...

A Very Rude Blue Jays Fan Found Pablo Sandoval A New Belt

Big-bellied Pablo Sandoval had a bit of a mishap with his belt during Saturday’s game against the Blue Jays. It happened during his second at-bat of the season, and it’s honestly starting to feel like some higher power is ordering Sandoval’s 2016 campaign to be a never-ending fat joke. For example:...

Oh No

Baseball Is Back And Thank Fucking God

At last, the death-gods have released their cold, icy grip on the United States; the trees are green, the birds are singing, and our greatest sport has returned. While there’s just too much to keep track of in terms of who’s where and what’s what and who’s going to do what and such—FiveThirtyEight, ...

Some Tragic Displays of Athletic Competition on the <i>Bachelor </i>Franchise 

The Bachelor franchise is successful because viewers experience a light but undeniable catharsis from watching other people humiliate themselves. ...

Pablo Sandoval Loses Starting Job To Some Guy

This is not to denigrate newly crowned Red Sox opening day third baseman Travis Shaw, because Travis Shaw has had a killer spring, and no one’s really quite sure what to make of him. But teams usually need more than a hint of promise to bench a guy owed $72.4 million over the next four years. Not th...