ac Page 822 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
That Ain't Money
Wallace Gilberry taunts Johnny Manziel with the money sign after sacking him in the first quarter today in Cleveland....
Butthole Eaten At Lions Tailgate
The reader who sent this photo along says he saw this butthole-eating in the parking lot of Nemo's, a bar near Ford Field. Kickoff's at 4:25, so these fans have plenty of time....
Floyd Mayweather Claims He Wants To Fight Manny Pacquiao On May 2nd
Floyd Mayweather has issued a challenge to long-time rival Manny Pacquaio, asking for a fight on May 2nd. Mayweather, speaking in an interview with Showtime, is seemingly responding to the calls Pacquiao made for a bout between the two before his Nov. 22 win over Chris Algieri. ...
This Panda Is One Cute-As-Shit Action Hero
This GIF becomes 100 percent funnier if you imagine that there is a hail of gunfire coming at the panda from the right side of the frame. Go ahead and do that right now....
Barry Larkin Hassled Sony Execs To Get A Discount On A Microphone
Barry Larkin made an estimated $78 million during his Hall of Fame career, and presumably makes an excellent salary now as an ESPN baseball analyst. Despite this wealth, he needed help last month from Sony executives to get an employee discount on a microphone, according to emails released in the So...
Nobody Wants Fernando Torres
Fernando Torres must've thought that his two-year loan move away from Chelsea—where, instead of repaying his outrageous transfer fee with a highlight reel of goals, he became more well known for his comical, almost unbelievable ability to miss unmissable shots—to AC Milan would be the perfect opport...
How CBS And The NFL Teamed Up To Screw <em>Wheel Of Fortune</em> And <em>Jeopardy!</em>
In January, CBS acquired the rights to air NFL Network's Thursday Night Football through the first half of the season. That slate turned out to be some of the shittiest professional football ever put on television, and it was a financial catastrophe for the Tiffany network. But prime-time nation...
My Goodness, The Challenge Flag Is Still So Dumb
Were you watching Thursday night football? I hope you weren't. The most exciting part was debating whether a little red flag fell or was thrown....
Dickhead Jaguars Fan Cancels Texans Fans' Plane Tickets
If you're looking for another reason to stay off Facebook and social media sites in general, allow me to offer this one: There are Jaguars fans on social media, and some of them are sociopaths....
Sony Leak: Will Ferrell As Donald Sterling In A <em>Ruthless People</em> Remake?
One of the oddest revelations in the Sony mega-leak features a pitch to remake the 1986 Danny DeVito film Ruthless People as a take on Donald Sterling, starring Will Ferrell as the former Clippers owner and Melissa McCarthy as his wife Shelly....
Thank God That Cardinals-Rams Game Finally Shut Up And Died
Jim Nantz earned his per diem Thursday tonight when he diagnosed, during the final moments of the drudgery that was Cardinals-Rams, what a throwback this game was....
Congress Staffers Walk Out, Perform "Hands Up, Don't Shoot" Protest
Staff from both the U.S. House and Senate, along with elected officials and the Senate chaplain, walked out today to show support for those protesting the deaths of Michael Brown and Eric Garner....
How Japan Built The World's Best Horse Racing
TOKYO — I came to watch Japan's top racehorses, arguably the strongest in the world, contest last Sunday's Japan Cup, worth more than $5 million. I left believing that the reason the Japanese racing industry is so much healthier and more popular than any of its counterparts is about much more tha...
The Piggyback Bandit Has Found A New Stomping Ground
Newer readers, or those with faulty memories, may have forgotten about Sherwin Shayegan, better known as The Piggyback Bandit. Let us remind you. ...
Awful Neighbor Sics City On Backyard Rink That Causes "Visual Harm"
Backyard ice rinks are a tradition in Canada and the northern United States. They are practically the only benefit of living in the goddamn tundra. Some backyard rinks are amateur affairs, nothing more than some 2x4s and a hose, while others cost thousands of dollars and have lights, real boards, an...
Jadeveon Clowney Out Nine Months After Microfracture Knee Surgery
Houston Texans 2014 number one overall draft pick Jadeveon Clowney will be out for approximately nine months after undergoing microfracture knee surgery yesterday, according to Adam Schefter. Professional athletes undergoing microfracture knee surgery have had mixed results, with some (Marques Colst...
How Is Madison Bumgarner Even A Real Person?
If you were to judge Sports Illustrated's big Sportsman of the Year feature on Madison Bumgarner simply by the magazine's cover and Tom Verducci's lede—"In one of Earth's great hardwood forests, that wind swoops and soars through white pines, maples, oaks, chestnuts and poplars..."—you might roll ...
Police Were Busy At Lambeau Field
It was a damp 32 degrees at kickoff, the self-service beer machines were up and running, and the fine people of Green Bay had themselves, as Hank Williams Jr. used to say, a Monday night party. ...
ESPN Duped By Fake Ken Rosenthal Twitter Account
At 1:12 a.m. ET, Jon Heyman broke the news that the Oakland A's had traded Jeff Samardzija to the Chicago White Sox: ...
LeBron, Irving, Garnett, Others Wear "I Can't Breathe" T-Shirts
If you don't like serious cultural issues "intruding" into the sports world, it's going to be another tough week for you. The Cavaliers are playing against the Nets in Brooklyn tonight, and the Barclays Center has become a hub of protest against police brutality, especially the killing by a NYPD cop...