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Ladies, Chad Ochocinco's Marriage Proposal Will Have You Sopping Wet
Chad Ochocinco proposed to model/TV person/Antoine Walker-dater Evelyn Lozada back in November of 2010, with the wedding set for next week. But the details of the actual proposal have gone shrouded in secrecy, until Lozada spilled the beans on a radio interview last week....

Because This Stuff Never Gets Old, Here's Carmelo Anthony Scaring People By Pretending To Be A Wax Figure
Melo got his sculpture at Madame Tussauds in Times Square yesterday, and in between saying things like "my time is coming," he did that thing where he stands stock-still until unsuspecting ticket-buyers get close enough to spook. There were no reactions as magical as this one, but Anthony's timing...

There's Some Tim Lincecum Voodoo Going On At The Marlins' Bobblehead Museum
We've already highlighted the horrors of Marlins Park's Bobblehead Museum, featuring a moving glass case that keeps the heads bobbling...ever bobbling. But there, in some severed ceramic, may lie the answer to Tim Lincecum's struggles....

How "Seven Nation Army" Conquered The Sports World
The Euro 2012 semifinals kick off today, and 69 goals in, you might have noticed one fan chant being sung after every single one. How did an eminently chantable White Stripes ditty become soccer's universal goal celebration? This piece, originally published Jan. 13, 2012, has your answers....

Stray Bullet Falls Through Tropicana Field Roof, Hits Fan
During a game against the Marlins two weekends ago, a Rays fan visiting from the Florida panhandle felt something strike his leg. It hit so hard, he thought it was a foul ball. But another fan nearby rooted around on the ground and came up with a bullet....

Bridezilla On Wedding Brawl: "I'll Be Damned If Someone Is Going To Infiltrate My Wedding And Whoop My Ass"
Welcome to Tuesday Night Fights, a weekly celebration and analysis of street-fight videos found on YouTube. Tonight's fisticuffs: the potentially staged "Bitch Fight." Tonight's commentator: Danni Starr (a proud new mommy who handled the blowback from her appearance on two episodes of Bridezillas ...

Deadspin Up All Night: Warming Up
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. Erik tonight, plus the Fights....

Free Agent Says Money Is Important
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: So Steve Nash isn't going to the Knicks, then....

How To Eat Dog Shit: A Condiments Guide
Before we get to the Funbag, two things. First of all, I'm on vacation next week. So we're gonna have another guest Funbag host to answer all your questions. To send a Funbag submission to our guest host, just email the tips line. The good thing about submitting questions to the guest host is that y...

Someone's Trying To Stop The Tim Tebow-Brady Quinn Catfight
Way back in February, when we were still wiping the effluvia of Tebowmania off our jorts, GQ published an oral history of the then-Broncos QB's unlikely season. It was well done, but as so often happens with these things, an entire magazine article was sieved through to find the one hint of controve...

Golf Pants For All, Even Those Who Are Terrible At Golf
'Tis the season of endless summer days spent perfecting your chip shot in pursuit of that elusive double eagle. So what are you going to wear? Let Bonobos, the geniuses who bring you the perfect-fitting pants, help you at least look like you know what you're doing on the links this summer....

Deadspin Up All Night: Welcome To The Machine
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. Please catch up on day one of things, if you'd like....

If You Are A Projected Lottery Pick, You Should Never Ever Go Back To School
Oh, Jared Sullinger. I wish I had a time machine so I could go back to 2011 and give you this message and tell you all the mean things the draftniks are saying about you. Despite being a projected top 10 pick last year, maybe top five, you were stung by a brutal loss to Kentucky in the Sweet 16, and...

Metta World Peace Says The Lakers Are The NBA's Best Team And Don't Need To Make Any Changes
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: World Peace is unlikely to become a GM one day....

OK, Let's Talk About Kinja
Consider this your Kinja open thread. I'll be floating around down there all day, and so will the rest of the staff (and maybe Denton, too, once he's done running over your dog). Questions? Concerns? Thoughts?...

The Blue Jackets Turned Down The Islanders' Entire Draft For Their No. 2 Pick
The Blue Jackets, despite the worst record in the NHL, missed out on the first overall pick (It was very sad) and can't miss winger Nail Yakupov. But there was a silver lining at No. 2: can't miss defenseman Ryan Murray. People love Ryan Murray, and think he might be NHL-ready now. If you're going t...

Welcome To The New Commenting System
Everyone, this is Kinja. Kinja, everyone. A few things you should know....

Deadspin Up All Night: Run To The Hills
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin....

Reports: Kevin Youkilis Traded To Chicago White Sox
The Boston Red Sox desire to trade Kevin Youkilis has been no secret and it appears both Red and White Sox have finally pulled the trigger. Reports out of the clubhouse are that Youkilis's nameplate has been removed from his locker and Bobby Valentine said there is a "situation pending."...

Chinese Man Died Of Exhaustion Trying To Watch All Of Euro 2012
A Chinese man has reportedly died after staying up for 11 straight nights (because of the time difference) to watch every match of Euro 2012....