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"Abe Lincoln Bandit" Robs Houston Bank While Wearing Mets Cap
My only thought is that because this guy has ostentatious facial hair, he might be a relief pitcher, and because he might be a relief pitcher, he might be a better setup man than Miguel Batista, once he gets this whole bank robbery situation squared away. But since he made off with less than $100 in...
Mario Balotelli Impregnates Person
Ninety or so minutes of soccer ago, Mario Balotelli was playing like the best player on the best team in the world. Now he's going to be a father. That's some consolation, right?...
The Weekend's Most Exciting Soccer Match Ended With A Coach Rolling Around In Tears
Let's set the scene: the home stadium of Buenos Aires side Chacarita Juniors, which finished 20th in Argentina's second division and was playing for its professional life. The stakes: remaining in Argentina's Nacional B. Chacarita was playing third division winners Nueva Chicago in the second leg ...
Former Olympic Champion Nastia Liukin Faceplants After Her Dad Fails To Spot Her Correctly
2008 Olympic women's gymnastics all-around champion and Subway sandwich spokesperson Nastia Liukin will likely take no part in this year's London Games after an embarrassing uneven bars fall she can blame as much on her coach/spotter/dad Valeri Liukin as she can her own mistake. ...
Deadspin Up All Night: One, Two, Three, Four
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. Be good....
Runner Shoved Mascot (Who May Have Been A 14-Year-Old Girl) After Winning Race
His name is Mahiedine Mekhissi-Benabbad and he won gold in the 3,000 meter steeplechase at the European athletics championship held in Helsinki. After crossing the finish line he stalked over to some tiny mascot, slapped something out of its hands and shoved it out of the way. Information provided...
Your Sunday Open Thread Smorgasbord
We've got baseball, Spain-Italy in the Euro 2012 Final at 2:45 p.m., Golf at 3:00 p.m., Nascar and more baseball. If I left anything out, it is OFF LIMITS and you are prohibited by law from discussing it. If that's a problem, contact my lawyer, but he's busy handling a blackmail case, so leave a me...
Deadspin Up All Night: She Done Me Good
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. We'll see you all tomorrow....
Insane Man Goes Hunting For Murderous "Testicle-Eating" Fish
Jeremy Wade hosts a show called "River Monsters," so I suppose this would fall under the show's umbrella. After hearing word of a fish that killed two men by eating their testicles, causing them to bleed to death, Wade decided to seek out the culprit....
Denver Brewery Makes Clown Question Bro Beer, Bryce Harper Suggests Donating Proceeds To Fund For Daughter Of Slain Officer
Fine, so it was someone in Bryce Harper's stable of handlers, but still, it's a nice sentiment. "That's a clown question, bro" has taken on a life of it's own and a Denver brewery named a beer using the famous retort to join in on all the fun just as Harper was in town to play the Rockies....
Rufus The Pigeon-Scaring Hawk At Wimbledon Has Gone Missing, Foul Play Suspected
Disturbing news out of Wimbledon today: a hawk named Rufus, who has been used to scare away pigeons and other small, distracting birds from the courts at the All England Club, was stolen early Friday morning. He was in his cage, in a car parked on a private driveway in Wimbledon. The car's rear win...
Four-Team Trade Sends Lamar Odom To The Clippers, ESPN Searching For New Picture Of Tadija Dragićević
The Mavericks sent disgruntled power forward/Kardashian sweetheart to the Los Angeles Clippers in a deal including four teams. The Clippers sent Mo Williams to the Utah Jazz who in turn received the draft rights to Shan Foster from the Mavericks. Dallas received the draft rights to Tadija Dragićevi...
Your Saturday Afternoon Open Thread Smorgasbord
We've got "The Fortnight," baseball, some Nascar and soggy golf if that's your cup of tea. Let's discuss!...
Deadspin Up All Night: Summer Madness
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. You're all the best. Sean and Burke will do their thing this weekend like they're goaltending for the Hartford Whalers....
Jay Bilas Still Wants To Talk About Men's Bodies
When Jay Bilas wasn't busy talking about "rims" he was busy talking about bodies. Last year it was all about hands, but this year the name of the game was "wingspan," "wingspan," and also "wingspan." Understandably the guy has to find something to talk about in the time that it takes David Stern t...
Discussion Discussion: A Word About Trolls And Stupid People, From The Deadspin Kinja Faeries
"Ultimately, who gives a shit?"...
Dead Letters: "Gggghhgagajaggggj-gggggghghggjgjg"
Subject: Anderson was the “somebody cute’...
Don't Expect A Catchy Name For The College Football Playoff
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: Bill Hancock suggests the "College Football Championship."...
Chris Bosh And Dwyane Wade Have Both Dropped Out Of The Olympics
Bosh cites his strained abdominal. Wade needs knee surgery. Do you think this will turn most Americans against the Miami Heat? [ESPN]...
Dogs Are Not Your Manhood's Best Friend
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase three heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....