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Sebastian Janikowski Rewarded Himself With A Dip After His Record-Tying Field Goal
Your morning roundup for Sept. 13, the day we decided to sue the people who rescued our dog because they're the ones who subsequently lost it. H/T to readers Christopher and Jonathan for the Janikowski photo. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....

Your MNF Late Game Open Thread
One gets the sense that when this game was scheduled, someone had dreams of Tim Tebow starting dancing in their heads. Alas, it's not to be, as at least two quarterbacks, Ubaldo Jimenez, and John Elway would all have to get hurt before Tebow gets in this game. Unless...H-back time!...

Your MNF Early Game Open Thread
The Worldwide Leader has everyone in the nation covered tonight! Join us here to discuss Patriots-Dolphins and the ongoing mystery that is Tom Brady's coiffure. Kickoff's at 7 p.m. Eastern on ESPN, and we'll have a new thread up in time for Raiders-Broncos at 10:15....

Justin Bieber Is A More Dedicated Sports Fan Than You
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: the Biebs is a Maple Leafs fan, so he can't be a bandwagoner, right?...

If There Is One Man Who Can Pull Off Socks, Sandals, And A Blazer, It's Probably Michael Vick
From yesterday's postgame press conference, via Eagles Blogger Room....

Clydesdales Genuflecting Toward Lower Manhattan, And Other 9/11 Inanities
We're doing a season-long NFL roundtable with our friends at Slate. Check back here each week as a rotating cast of football watchers discusses the weekend's key plays, coaching decisions, and traumatic brain injuries....

SprtsCntr: Merril Hodge Has A New Toy
What is ESPN prattling on about right now? We condense your morning SportsCenter to its essence....

Tony Soprano Probably Saved The Jets By Having The Cowboys Whacked
Your morning roundup for Sept. 12, the day after there just wasn't enough 9/11 coverage on television. Photo via @xmasape. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....

Your Sunday Night Football Open Thread
Dallas at New York: Thanks to the wonders of the internet and my on again-off again relationship with Hermione Granger, I will be at this game. Not gonna lie, the idea of going to a stadium with 80,000 people for a prime time game involving a New York team and "America's Team" is a little..¿Cómo se ...

Your NFL Late Games Open Thread
We are continuing our hot open thread action this afternoon, so let's get to it before the excitement of new experiences wears off and we realize, while looking around awkwardly, oh my god, what have we done. Previews and chat, downtown. ...

Here's Video Of The Friday Night Fights At A Detroit Eatery
Explained YouTuber FullerVision, "Went to the money to get a corn beef sandwich and got some entertainment while waiting." There's some cussing, and bare male ass herein, for what it's worth....

Your NFL Early Games Open Thread
We're going to be doing some hot open thread action today, so let's get all experimental together. A preview of all the important story lines this afternoon is provided for your edification. Enjoy the games and chat it up down below! ...

Denard Robinson Took Just 21 Seconds To Lead Michigan's 80-Yard Game-Winning Drive Over Notre Dame
Your morning roundup for Sept. 11, a day to remember those we lost. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....

M-Bish, Who Smokes That Kush, Totally Calls His Fellow Tenth Graders Out As Tools, Dirty Rags
Mikey Bish's NSFWoS lyrical stylings about doing "whatever the fuck I want," "backing up my game with the hottest bitches" and the nuances of pimp-hand cross-training are true American treasures....

Your College Football Night Games Open Thread
Notre Dame at Michigan. First night game at the Big House. Should be fun, provided the stadium evacuations are kept to a minimum (ESPN, 8 p.m.)...

Your College Football Afternoon Games Open Thread
The showcase game this afternoon is Alabama heading into Happy Valley to face Ole Joe and his Nittany Lions. Game's on ABC, throwback style....

Your College Football Early Games Open Thread
The noon games include Oregon State at No. 8 Wisconsin (ESPN), Toledo at No. 15 Ohio State (Big 10 Network) and Florida Atlantic at No. 17 Michigan State (ESPN3)....

Your U.S. Open Semifinals Open Thread
Weather permitting — and it's expected to do just that — both the men's and women's semifinals will be played in Flushing Meadows, NY today....

Now The Phillies Have Decided To Affect The Outcome Of Milwaukee's Sausage Races
"Before the top of the sixth began, [second baseman] Pete Orr forgot to look both ways when exiting the dugout and accidentally stepped in front of five racing sausages. He ducked between Polish and Italian but smacked into Hot Dog. The fans booed the sheepish Canadian, who smirked as an entire du...

At Least Four Arizona State Fans Went To Last Night's Game In Blackface
Your morning roundup for Sept. 10, a day when it's apparently illegal for wannabe vampires to bite homeless men outside the neighborhood Hooters. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....