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Derek Jeter Is On A Mission From God
Your morning roundup for July 11, the day we canceled our tickets to Rio. Photo taken at St. Joseph's on Capitol Hill, Washington D.C., by Brian J. McLaughlin....

Make This North Dakota TV Sports Reporter Go Poor — For A Good Cause
For one more hour, KELO sports reporter Jim Madalinsky has promised to donate one dollar of his own salary for every new Facebook "like" he gets to Minot River flood relief. (That's in North Dakota). Go see if you can make him regret that decision. For some background, read the email below....

Derek Jeter, Josh Hamilton, The Dodgers And Cliff Lee All Had Shining Moments Yesterday
Your morning roundup for July 10, the day it pays to be wary of people with wide faces....

In His Latest Meltdown, Jose Canseco Decided To Publicize His Girlfriend's Phone Number, Drug Of Choice
What started with Jose Canseco's Thursday announcement that "I am asking leila shennib to marry me .will you marry me" has somehow gone off the rails. Imagine that....

Concussed Cyclist Doesn't Remember Finishing Yesterday's Stage Of The Tour De France
Your morning roundup for July 9, the day Detroit teaches us to respect the crackheads who walk among us....

Stories That Don't Suck: SportsFeat's Guide To The Ballplayer's Twilight
Every Friday, SportsFeat picks a few great weekend reads for Deadspin. In honor of Derek Jeter and his labored quest for 3,000 hits, here are well-told stories of ballplayers just before, in the years after, or at the exact moment they retired....

Matt Leinart Is Totally Working Out Every Day For When The Lockout Ends, You Guys
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: the free agent on his freedom....

We’re Going To Live Forever By Killing Ourselves And Going To Digital Heaven
Earlier this week, a scientist named Aubrey de Grey (that is such a drag queen name) made waves by announcing to the press that the first person to live 150 years has probably already been born, and that it may not be long before human beings are able to live 1,000 years, if not longer, thanks to ge...

Cockblocked By Tyler Thigpen!
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase three heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....
![DeSean Jackson Tells Radio Caller He's A "Gay-Ass, Faggot" [UPDATE]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/Image_Not_Found_1x_qjofp8.png)
DeSean Jackson Tells Radio Caller He's A "Gay-Ass, Faggot" [UPDATE]
Brian from DCFanatic.com recorded the above audio during Eagles wideout DeSean Jackson's June 30 appearance on the All Out Show with Rude Jude and Lord Sear. (It airs on Sirius XM's Shade 45—an Eminem-branded hip hop channel—and is uncensored, if you're interested.)...

Exclusive: We've Obtained Audited Financials For The NFL League Office
These are audited financial statements for the NFL's league office, the nerve center of professional football, covering the years ended March 31, 2009, and March 31, 2010. The documents below deal with only one piece of NFL operations, and there aren't any obviously mind-melting revelations about th...

Of Rangers And Railings
The death of Shannon Stone, the man who died after falling at Rangers Ballpark, had personal meaning for me. As a kid, I had an irrational, omnipresent fear that I would trip and fall while descending the aisle in the upper deck, and go over the edge. Especially at Shea Stadium, where the stairs wer...

Erotica Failed To Get Michael Morse Into The All-Star Game
Your morning roundup for July 8, the day Carl Monday struck fear into the hearts of the Steroid Cartels. Photo via tipster Kal....

He Apologized For His Unacceptable Behavior!
"Hey everyone. I'm taking this time to apologize for my involvement with the post game riots after the Bruins defeated the Canucks to take the Stanley Cup. My involvement was a bad decision I made in the heat of the moment and it something that i feel a profound sense of regret towards. I would li...

Dear Grantland: Your Motto Is Wrong
ESPN's Grantland still lacks a forum for comments and corrections, so we are providing this space to help the site's audience share its thoughts—criticism, praise, or otherwise. Comments below reflect the opinions of Grantland readers and are not necessarily the views of Deadspin. Readers who have a...

Curt Schilling: No Winning Team Was Steroid-Free, Not Even My Own
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: Schill was aware of PED use, but he couldn't swear on it....

Watch A Hockey Referee Materialize Out Of Thin Air
This is from the 2009 Western Conference finals, and we have no idea why it just showed up on YouTube yesterday. But watch at the 0:07 mark, when linesman Brad Lazarowich enters the picture, seemingly out of nowhere. We've watched this about a billion times, and we think we've figured it out: it's...

Naked Children In Public: A Deadspin Special Investigation
The night before I got married, my parents hosted a rehearsal dinner at a restaurant in DC. They rented out one of the side rooms for the dinner, and the event room had its own set of bathrooms separate from the restaurant's main pissers. So before the dinner, my dad went into the men's room and pla...

Qatar May Be Too Hot To Play Two Halves In World Cup Games
With all the Ts crossed, the Is dotted, and the money counted, FIFA is seemingly only now realizing that it gets really fucking hot in Qatar. That's bad for fans, and it's unsafe for players. But rather than take that into account before going to the desert, they'd rather mess with one of the game's...

For Once, Lionel Messi Makes Soccer Look Very, Very Difficult
Your morning roundup for July 7, the day we were promised the internets....