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Troy Tulowitzki Scores From First On A Bloop Single, Miguel Tejada Nearly Gets Thrown Out At Home On A HR
I guess what we're saying is that Tulo always hustles, while Tejada is looking to top the Tater Tot Tracker charts....

Dirk Nowitzki Is Big In Germany
Your morning roundup for June 29, the day we started rapping on light poles. Image — of Dirk Nowitzki's triumphant return to his hometown of Wurzburg, Germany — via MSNBC Photoblog....

One Armand De Brignac Midas Bottle For £120,000! An Unscientific Analysis Of An Enormous Johnson's Epic Bar Tab In London
Atlantic City casino scourge Don Johnson (not to be confused with 80s-era TV scourge Don Johnson) must have seen the damage the Bruins did in the MGM Grand bar in Foxwoods recently. He must have burned with envy. For those of you unaware, Don Johnson has earned the dubious moniker of "The Champagne ...

Hunt For Beejoli Shah, Fabulist Author Of Viral "Quentin Tarantino Sucked My Toes!" Story Begins (UPDATE)
So, friendsicles: how many of you had the email from "beejoli" forwarded to you this morning and have subsequently sent it along to others? Dozens, I bet. Thousands even. Dozens of thousands probably. Its veracity is still unknown but I know Gawker is dutifully trying to track down "beejoli" to see ...

John Calipari Has A Shockingly Logical Plan For Paying Players
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: Calipari on how to pay just the ones that bring in the money....

The Right Place At The Right Time: Remembering Lorenzo Charles
In the photographs of that moment, he doesn't show an expression of power, of joy, of triumph or even relief. His eyebrows are arched back, his eyes are wide, his face drawn into a grimace. N.C. State's Lorenzo Charles does not look like a man dunking a basketball, but rather a man returning to Eart...

What's The Best Way To Clean Up Spooge After Bareback Sex?
Hey, I'm some lady. I'm filling in for that guy you like, who is on vacation, which means that he is most likely drinking rum out of a hollow fruit and riding a horse on a beach somewhere right now (romantic!). Speaking of segueing into talking about horses, my main beef with horses is how fragile t...

The Search For The Pisswater-Drinking Boston Bruin Is On
On the Bruins' epic bar tab from Foxwoods, there lies a lone Amstel Light. Who ordered it? Why? The world may never know. But Amstel is offering that player free beer if he steps forward....

Kawhi Leonard Is 11½ Inches
News 4 San Antonio is really, really excited about the size of Kawhi Leonard's hands. So much so that they put together this graphic comparing him to the newsroom, without bothering to specify what they're talking about....

Even These Freaks Have More Business On A Baseball Field Than Jeff Francoeur
Your morning roundup for June 28, the day we celebrated an extinction. (Photo of Cirque Du Soleil throwing out the first pitch at the Padres game via Getty Images.)...

Charles Barkley Has Opinions On Things
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: Barkley is asked questions and gives answers and it's fascinating as always....

Man Vs. Lion Goes Down Pretty Much How You'd Expect
A modern day Egyptian gladiator announced plans to fight a lion to the death in the name of boosting tourism. This weekend he made good, locking himself in a steel cage with a bored, lazy lion who just wanted to digest the whole donkey he was fed beforehand....

Why Your Fans Are Weird: The Bunny Man Of Yankee Stadium
We've seen the Bunny Man at enough Yankee games over the years to know he's got season tickets, and the felt rabbit handpuppet is doing his thing 100 percent of the time. Throughout the entire game the bunny sits on his lap, watching the game—he moves the puppet's head to follow the action on the ...

Deadspin's 2011 NHL Entry Draft Running Diary
Welcome to Deadspin's first and likely last annual NHL Draft Diary. Follow along with due reverence for the most thrilling pageant in all of sport....

Finally, We Get To Talk About Old, Decrepit Yankees Who Are Not Derek Jeter
Your morning roundup for June 27, the day this dog made us question if there was any good in the world. Image of Reggie Jackson enjoying retirement via the New York Daily News....

You Can Fly Like James Bond In "Thunderball" For The Low, Low Price Of $249
Dave Tuxbury works at a place in the Florida Keys where you can strap on a jetpack like the one Sean Connery used in "Thunderball" and, with the help of 30-foot hoses that use seawater as a propellant, fly like a mechanized falcon. They say it's the only place in the country where one can do this....

In Mongo Wrestling Alliance, Metalocalypse's Tommy Blacha brings us a world where pro wrestling is reality
Imagine a world in which professional wrestling dynasties carry the same weight as royal families. Such is the standard operating procedure of Metalocalypse co-creator Tommy Blacha's new Adult Swim cartoon Mongo Wrestling Alliance.… [io9] ...

Deadspin Classic: Gay Softball's "Homo Quota"
With the gay marriage bill being passed in New York, and Pride celebrations taking place across the country, we revisit the question still vexing the world of gay softball: how many straight players are too many?...

American Patriot Tim Howard Thinks Soccer Ceremonies In America Should Be Conducted In American English
Your morning roundup for June 26, a day after a man who lost his arm to a rocket in Afghanistan caught a foul ball....

Here's Video Of Mexico Tying The Gold Cup Final At Two All
The U.S. went up 2-0 on a Landon Donovan goal from a Clint Dempsey assist. Mexico's Pablo Barrera countered with one six minutes later, leading to this José Andrés Guardado tally. Halftime score: 2-2....