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Commenter Update: Account Deletion And Password Resets
Here's how to delete your commenting account, courtesy Lifehacker's Adam Pash....

Killing Me Softly with This Bacon
What could possibly be more delicious than crispy, crackly, succulent bacon? How about...wait for it...bacon covered with chocolate?...

10 Things That Christmas Would Be Better Off Without
Despite indications to the contrary, I love me some Christmas. But like anything, it's not without its faults. So let's get rid of those faults now, shall we?...

And The Crowd Pelts The Corner Kicker With Snowballs …
This post, written by Josh Burt, is republished with permission from The Spoiler. Go there often if you like soccer stuff....

Weekend Winner: Philly, Now Better Than New York At Everything, Including Dog-Pun Headlines
This is today's New York Post cover. For the sake of comparison, this was the Philly Daily News's cover back in September. Yeah, the Post should've just punted that shit out of bounds....

The NFL Has Its Cigar Guy Moment
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Your NFL Late Games Open Thread
The NY Jets play Pittsburgh today. Even Franco Harris will be rooting for Rex Ryan after watching the infuriatingly horrendous attempt at humor below, brought to you by the fine people at the Eagle Tribune....

Your NFL Early Games Open Thread
The Jacksonville Jaguars can build a two-game division lead with two games to go should the beat the Indianapolis Colts. Considering they've already beaten the Colts this year, this is a clinch-worthy deal. [Jacksonville.com]...

Bernard Hopkins Wins, Loses And Draws In The Same Night
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Danny Woodhead Doesn't Know Danny Woodhead Personally But Thinks "He's A Likable Guy"
Setting aside my disdain of corporate gimmicks for a moment — like, say, the sickening PR blood-orgy called "Undercover Boss" — this sporting-goods store/sneaker-company mashup that puts Patriots RB Danny Woodhead to work hawking his jersey is rather-OK fare....

New York Ranger Gets Orange Gatorade Facial
In today's Flyers/Rangers game, call-up center Dale Weise had a goal waved off due to his "distinct kicking motion" to score it. Then, he tried to get some refreshment. (H/T The 700 Level) ...

Your College Basketball Open Thread
Sixth-ranked Kansas State tips off against No. 24 Florida at 3:30 p.m. Gonzaga throws with No. 9 Baylor an hour later....

Lenny Dykstra Won't Dispense Stock Tips And Autograph Balls For $35 At A Mall Today After All
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Prepare For The Next Big Deadspin Shitstorm
Monday morning, Dec. 20, will mark the beginning of some not-so-relaxing days for a handful of current and former professional athletes, college coaches, and, of course, ESPN employees. Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls: dying time's here....

Charles Barkley Wonders Why Favre Didn't Send "Humongous Junk" Photos
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: Sir Charles talks about...well, everything....

Is This Randy Moss Anonymously Bashing Jeff Fisher On Nashville Radio?
Someone named “Woody” called into Clay Travis’s show, blasting Jeff Fisher and hoping he’s done in Tennessee. Then someone else pointed out that it sounded an awful lot like malcontent receiver Randy Moss. Very interesting....

Heat Strokes, Game 27: Heat-Knicks, The Best Kind Of Rancor
FreeDarko's Bethlehem Shoals, a regular contributor to NBA FanHouse and co-author of The Undisputed Guide to Pro Basketball History (visit the FreeDarko store, too!), is keeping a game-by-game diary of the Heat's season — the one you're pretending not to care about....

Cockblocked By A Ferret!
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase four heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....

Devils’ Advocate: Toepocalypse Now
Every week, this recent Duke graduate will offer you a new reason not to hate the Duke Blue Devils, the bestest basketball team in the land. You are free to disagree....

Send Us Your Holiday Party Horror Stories
For someone who has spent such a large portion of his life drinking and vomiting, I have a shocking deficit of embarrassing holiday party stories. That's where you come in....