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Prepare For The Next Big Deadspin Shitstorm
Monday morning, Dec. 20, will mark the beginning of some not-so-relaxing days for a handful of current and former professional athletes, college coaches, and, of course, ESPN employees. Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls: dying time's here....

Charles Barkley Wonders Why Favre Didn't Send "Humongous Junk" Photos
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: Sir Charles talks about...well, everything....

Is This Randy Moss Anonymously Bashing Jeff Fisher On Nashville Radio?
Someone named “Woody” called into Clay Travis’s show, blasting Jeff Fisher and hoping he’s done in Tennessee. Then someone else pointed out that it sounded an awful lot like malcontent receiver Randy Moss. Very interesting....

Heat Strokes, Game 27: Heat-Knicks, The Best Kind Of Rancor
FreeDarko's Bethlehem Shoals, a regular contributor to NBA FanHouse and co-author of The Undisputed Guide to Pro Basketball History (visit the FreeDarko store, too!), is keeping a game-by-game diary of the Heat's season — the one you're pretending not to care about....

Cockblocked By A Ferret!
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase four heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....

Devils’ Advocate: Toepocalypse Now
Every week, this recent Duke graduate will offer you a new reason not to hate the Duke Blue Devils, the bestest basketball team in the land. You are free to disagree....

Send Us Your Holiday Party Horror Stories
For someone who has spent such a large portion of his life drinking and vomiting, I have a shocking deficit of embarrassing holiday party stories. That's where you come in....

Telestrator Dong Breaks Out On The Odd-Dong Rush
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

The Worst News Lede You'll Read All Year (UPDATE)
"For the past month, body parts have been piling up around Miami-Dade and Broward counties like extra pounds on Kim Kardashian come Christmas time." [Miami New-Times, Google cache Screengrab below]...

Vikings Fans: Enjoy Joe Webb, No Guaranteed Seating, And No Booze
How many Minnesotans are wondering if they can just cancel the season now? Monday's game at TCF Bank Stadium will be "first-come, first-serve" and there will be no alcohol sold. Also, terrible football. [Pioneer Press]...

Jayson Werth Wants To Kick Phillies Fans Out Of Nationals Park
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: the Nats' big prize on his old fanbase's DC pilgrimages....

The Road to Heaven Is Paved with Glazed Donuts
Donuts don't have to be for in-mall starvation attacks, road trips, county fairs, or your office's morale-boosting "Treat Fridays" anymore. You can now whip up a sextet of luscious dough-balls right in your very own home....

You'll Never Guess Which White Patriots Player Has The Best Selling Jersey
I know we keep harping on this. But Hub fans keep doing stuff like running out and buying a guy's jersey just because he's "scrappy."...

Who Wants To See A Cockatoo Singing That Drowning Pool Song?
We consider this a public service to the five of you who haven't yet seen Lolita the cockatoo singing the WWE classic, "Bodies."...

Bill Simmons And Tawwmy From Quinzee, Together At Last
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Los Angeles May Not Have An NFL Team, But It Does Have Three Shiny Stadium Designs
Anschutz Entertainment Group (AEG) has released renderings from three architecture firms. AEG will select one to move forward with in the "next month." There are, of course, 100 things that might hinder this timeline, but for now, let's just ooh and ah....

Here's Your "The Battle For Nate Robinson's Tiny Soul" Knicks-Celtics Open Thread
A rivalry! Kinda! Tonight, ESPN begins the resurrection of the dormant-for-like-ever Knicks-Celtics rivalry. We all know what this is really about, though: Nate Robinson and his tiny soul....

Ryan Clark Rocks Out With Bieber, Cries With Ochocinco
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: the Steelers safety runs with different crowds....

The Sports Photo Of The Year, Snapped Accidentally
The AP's Morry Gash finally opens up about getting that awesome shot of Wade and LeBron — and it wasn't what he was aiming at. [FanHouse]...

Everyone At Real Madrid Hates Cristiano Ronaldo
The next few times Cristiano Ronaldo scores a goal and starts doing his "I'm great, me!" celebration shtick, look closely. What's wrong with the picture? Oh yeah, that's it....