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She's Just Not That Into You
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
You Should Be Watching Hockey This Weekend, Seriously
Remember when everyone was so into hockey that time? Ha! But there's plenty to love: the NCAA championship, an NHL playoff berth battle, and oh yeah, some Slovenian hockey players who won their league title then beat up their coach!...
"Lurking" Tiger's Hogan Bragging: Your Masters Open Thread
Two strokes back in the Masters, Tiger Woods compared his comeback to Ben Hogan's. And so the story of a man saving his wife from being killed by a bus has been co-opted by a man who threw his underneath....
The Boston Red Sox Will Brand Your Baby
"Every baby" born at Boston's Beth Israel will be indoctrinated into Red Sox Nation, whether you like it or not. The "Red Sox Babies" package includes hat, tote, and a lifetime of insufferability. [Beth Israel, "Benbino" pic via]...
How Will Joe Biden Manage to Offend Soccer Fans Everywhere?
Joe Biden will participate in the "first kick ceremonies" tonight to welcome Major League Soccer's newest team to America's angriest city. How will he bungle this particular public appearance? Here, a few ideas....
Lou Piniella Bawls Out With His Balls Out
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
Chicago Has A History Of Stadium Bathroom Stall Sex
John Kass's harrowing tale of Dr. Nemeth and his son—who had their Sox Opening Day ruined by a couple in Windy City heat—prompted one reader to send along his video of a post-coital couple at Wrigley from 2007....
The Curious Case Of The Ball State Ass Slapper
A serial bike-mounted butt-slapper has been terrorizing Ball State's campus. Dangerous sexual predator, or harmless fun? The student body is torn....
Dallas-Area Cheerleaders Piss Team Spirit, Piss
KXAS-TV does one of those routine cheerleaders-force-other-cheerleaders-to-drink-urine stories, only this one involves some gross-out B-roll and a "bad taste in their mouth" zinger as the kicker. Kudos to the awesomely monikered reporter, Ashanti Blaize. [Fat White Guy]...
Your Masters Open Thread (To Promote Discussion)
Possible topics for discussion: K.J. Choi and Fred Couples's taste in footwear. Talk below....
Shameless Couple Having Bathroom Sex Tarnishes Another Sports Stadium
Since one horny couple decided to sully Cowboys Stadium with their filthy, filthy bathroom sex last September, there haven't been many other drive-by humping incidents ruining sporting events. Until now. The Chicago Tribune's John Kass has the terrifying story....
Mark Sanchez Is Poised ... To Be A Whiffenpoof
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
Loneliness, Thy Name Is Pirates Fandom
Reader Chris sends along this picture of The Omega Man of Pirates fans. Why stay in the second row? Does PNC Park employ totalitarian ushers? Is he afraid of looking the fool should a foul ball approach? Fascinating to ponder....
Jeff Samardzija: "Great Lover/Friend," Says An Ex
Not every tip we've received about Jeff Samardzija has been negative. He has his defenders, too, and some pretty dedicated ones. So in the interests of fair play and equal time here's a very thoughtful defense of "The Shark."...
A Roundup Of Zombie Earl Woods Commercial Parodies (LOTS MORE UPDATES)
After the debut of Tiger's new commercial, it was inevitable that the spot would be parodied over and over again, with varying levels of success. Here are a bunch of the good ones....
Dead Wrestler Of The Week: Chris Kanyon
Every week, the Masked Man, Deadspin's pro wrestling correspondent, honors the sport's fallen and examines their legacies — famous and obscure alike. Today: Chris Kanyon, who was found dead Friday in his Queens, New York, apartment after an apparent suicide....
Your Prone-To-Be-Inquisitive Masters Open Thread
Tiger is teeing off at 1:42. Dan Jenkins is tweeting. Jim Nantz is flipping through a rhyming dictionary. Billy Payne is being stupid somewhere. And Zombie Earl Woods is promoting discussion (and Nike). Talk about it below. [Masters.com]...
The Jason Whitlock Bobblehead Doll Is My Next Purchase
Oh, but if only it could talk. Like, you'd pull a string and it'll spew all sorts of angry, nonsensical musings on race, sexuality, sports culture and social media pick-up lines: "I c u r a tulane grad." [KCStore]...
Last Night's Winner: Shameless Corporate Whores
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like Nike Industrial Shoe Works Corp., who made advertising history last night by somehow turning pathetic, unprincipled skirt-chasing into a compelling pitch for golf clubs....
The San "Francicso" Giants Need Spellcheck
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....