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Pat Riley Preferred to Parcel Out Looks of Disdain
Miami Heat coach Erik Spoelstra dubbed himself "Santa Spo" and "presented players with a vocabulary calendar and the book The Energy Bus: 10 Rules to Fuel Your Life, Work and Team with Positive Energy." Merry ... Christmas? [Miami Herald]...

I Was There: Even The Losers Get Lucky Sometimes
There are plenty of decade retrospectives happening everywhere right now, but we'd also like you to participate. Tell us about the best game you've seen in person this decade with the tag #iwasthere. Mine: Patriots at Giants, Week 17!...

All I Want for Christmas is to Never Hear That Song Again
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

"I Was There...": Best Sporting Events You've Seen In Person This Decade
There are plenty of decade retrospectives happening everywhere right now (including here), but we'd also like you to participate. Tell us about the best game you've seen in person this decade. Mine: Game 7, 2000 NHL Eastern Conference Finals....

Chad Ochocinco Can Receive And Give
Rather than bribing referees with George Washingtons, the wideout plans to toss a pinata filled with 2,000 one-spots into the stands if he scores on Sunday. He thinks he won't be fined. Maybe Christmas miracles are possible. [Bengals.com]...

In Which We Honor Christmas By Watching Basketball
And he whistled, and shouted, and called them by name: "Now, Heatsicles! Now, Knickerbockers! Now, Celtics and Magic! On, Kobe! On, LeBron! On, games on later that seem oh-so-tragic!" So please, talk amongst yourselves as Mariah Carey loops all afternoon....

The One Where We Find Out Why This Man Is Having Sex With A Car
We get a massive amount of tips in our inbox each week. Some are pretty interesting, but don't get published for one reason or another. (NSFW and NOT SAFE FOR CHRISTMAS.)...

If Being A Rhodes Scholar Is Cool, Then Everyone Wants To Be Bill Bradley
Myron Rolle postponed entering the NFL Draft to debate philosophy in Oxford pubs, and suddenly, two other high-profile college athletes — namely, Alabama's Greg McElroy and UConn's Maya Moore — are considering applying for Rhodes Scholarships next year. Trend alert!...

More Last Minute Gift Ideas: A Murder Conviction
A Yankee fan who ran over a Red Sox fan with her car after he mocked her team has been found guilty of second-degree murder. Shockingly, the New England jury did not consider it justifiable homicide....

How Can One Game Contain So Much Fail?
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Chan Ho Park And Chad Kreuter Are Least Likely Litigants Ever
Pitchers and catchers have a unique bond, unlike any other in sports. That still doesn't make it a good idea to lend a journeyman backstop money....

J.J. Redick Is Not Worried About TMZ Sports
"J.J. Redick read about TMZsports.com on Deadspin.com and said he wasn't really worried about it because he doesn't really do anything newsworthy. He also doesn't think there's a big market for sports gossip." DOES NOT COMPUTE. [OrlandoSentinel]...

Getting The Kinks Out Of Marriage
So there's this plucky startup headed by NFL wives to "strengthen the relationships between pro athletes and their significant others." The debut party's favors include "adult toys" for the men; strip poles for the women may be forthcoming. Seriously. [CNBC]...

Dear Deadspin Commenters: You Are The Reason The <em>Chicago Sun-Times</em> Is Full Of Racist Morons (UPDATE)
Commenters, prepare to be amused. A Sun-Times web editor named Matthew Wood chastised some of his newspaper's online community for nasty, racist remarks and has blamed this phenomenon on...Deadspin. Read on....

Everything You Need To Know About The Coming Minny-pocalypse
"When Favre changes the play at the line of scrimmage Childress bristles, even when the audible Favre calls works perfectly." Chilly's team is on the field. [ESPN]...

The Astrodome Would Make For A Lovely Stocking Stuffer
Still scavenging for Christmas gifts? Boy, do we have a miraculous idea for you: buy a washed-up stadium. They're on the going block! Only downside: You'll probably have to upgrade your tree. Shipping might be expensive, too. [WSJ]...

Bizarre Recruiting Hoax Fools None, Confuses All
A sad young man is accused of recruiting high school football players for East Carolina—a school he has no affiliation with and that has never heard of him. What could have been the point of this not-so-master plan?...
