ad Page 549 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Dead Letters: "You Are A Bruins Dan"
Subject: Seems a bit harsh...

How To Drive On An Interstate Highway Without Pissing Me Off
It’s summer now, and you know what that means: time to pack up some beach clothes, a bathing suit, a cooler, a couple good books, a bag of plastic beach toys, the kids’ floaties, the kids’ bathing suits, several large towels, a beach umbrella, one of those plastic sand screws you use to plant a bea...

Now, For Your Enjoyment, We Have Angry Bruins Fans Whaling On Each Other
Lots of tension in the arena tonight for Game 5 of the Stanley Cup Final. Lots of wound-up hockey fans. Perhaps this sort of thing was inevitable, although you’d expect it to at least be between opposing fans. Not so! Here we have two young Boston bros talking shit and hurling beer into the face of ...

Report: Coaches Wasted 25 Minutes Before Calling Paramedics In Heat Stroke Death Of Junior College Football Player
Football coaches at Garden City Community College, a prominent junior college program in Kansas that has played in two of the last three NJCAA championship games, reportedly delayed for 25 minutes before contacting paramedics after finding 19-year-old Braeden Bradforth collapsed outside his dorm las...

And Now, An Unsolicited Poem From A Yankees Fan
In a blog earlier this morning, I made the brave and extremely correct observation that the New York Yankees are a wicked, awful baseball team that deserves to play its home games on fields of fire and brimstone in the very pit of Hell itself....

Vlad Guerrero Jr.'s Righteous Dong Sent The Yankees To Hell Where They Belong
The vile and hideous New York Yankees were, inexplicably, somehow on the verge of maybe winning a game on Wednesday night, until a legend in the making shut them down. The Yanks have rightfully tasted victory only once in the month of June, and to prevent that disaster from happening again, the Toro...

This Is Why Kyle Lowry Was So Pissed
Early in the fourth quarter of Toronto’s Game 3 road victory over the Warriors, play was held up for a minute while Kyle Lowry appeared to scold either a Warriors fan or multiple Warriors fans or the referees or arena security, or all of the above. Upon review, it appeared that Lowry was pissed beca...

Deadspin Up All Night: Hold The Line
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. Onward....

Who The Hell Wants To Run The Wizards?
The Washington Wizards dismissed longtime personnel chief Ernie Grunfeld (his title was “president of basketball operations” but it was a role broadly analogous to “general manager”) back at the beginning of April. More than two months have passed. The draft is a little over two weeks away. Free age...

Norway Might Have Won The Whole Thing, If Only They Hadn't Alienated The Best Player In The World
The situation with Norway’s women’s soccer team is like something out of the Iliad. In this analogy, the World Cup is the Trojan War, the Norwegian team is the heavily armed but nonetheless overmatched Greek army, and Ada Hegerberg is Achilles, the Grecian hero of otherworldly abilities who very wel...

Adrien Broner Sued Over 2018 Sexual Assault Incident, No, Not That One, Another One
Welterweight boxer and all-around shitheel Adrien Broner is being sued in Ohio by a woman he sexually assaulted in a club in Cleveland in June 2018. For those keeping score at home, this is at least the second incident from the first half of 2018 where Broner was arrested for allegedly attacking and...

Let’s Do It. Let’s All Eat Salad With A Fuckin’ Spoon
Today, we’re talking about parsing online reviews, new candy bars, battered fries, oddly named Pennsylvania burgs, and more....

Diamondbacks Fan Tries To Crack Kenley Jansen With His Bare Cheeks
Can you spot the butt? Look closely. You’ll find it....

The Padres Killed A Lot Of Bees For Absolutely No Reason
Bees are dying globally at an alarming rate. And the San Diego Padres are doing their part to kill them....

The Night Climbers Of Islamabad
ISLAMABAD, Pakistan — Every night during Ramadan, about a dozen boys meet up in a parking lot that sits near Islamabad’s network of hiking trails to play cricket under the streetlights. You’re likely to see the same scene play out in any well-lit parking lot across the predominantly Muslim city. Bu...

Commissioner For A Day: Let's Get Rid Of The Clock In Basketball
Good news everybody: I’ve become the NBA commissioner for a day, and I’m going to abuse my brief, ill-gotten power to take a big sledgehammer to every game clock in every arena in North America. At least for the last three minutes....
![Andrew McCutchen Injures Knee In Stupid, Fluky, Unfair, Stupid Rundown [Update]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/zjosm0ucvfnhkyu4khwm.jpg)
Andrew McCutchen Injures Knee In Stupid, Fluky, Unfair, Stupid Rundown [Update]
If a player is going to be injured on the bases, you’d prefer it come from legging out a triple, or barreling into a catcher, or wrapping an arm around a middle infielder on a head-first slide into second base. A perfectly pointless and avoidable rundown between first and second is not at all an occ...

Nobody Has It Better Than Liverpool
Along the vast spectrum of possible states a soccer club could exist in, there is a vanishingly small patch that, for my tastes, qualifies as ideal....

Can’t Everyone Just Stop Hollering At Phil Kessel While He’s Tryin’ To Watch The Teevee?
With the long NHL offseason here and no more hockey being played at all*, a young fan’s fancy turns, of course, to trade drama. This year’s downright biblical playoffs mean lots of teams are likely to be in the mix this summer—Columbus is about to lose high-value Russians faster than Petrograd afte...

Dodgers' Will Smith Launches One To Bel Air For Walk-Off Win Against Philadelphia
Dodgers catcher Will Smith is not from West Philadelphia, neither born nor raised, and it’s not clear whether the playground was where he spent most of his days, but on Saturday he was certainly chillin’ out, maxin’, relaxin’ all cool while playing some baseball outside of the....101 Freeway? Whelp,...