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Ripped from the Headlines: Your Hardest News Roundup
This week in your newsiest roundup, North Korean Supreme Commander Kim Jong Il signs on for a starring role alongside Gary Oldman and Morgan Freeman, and the nation's idiots obtain minor lacerations due to the latest SNOWLOCAUST!...
NFL Scrubs Concussion Allusions From Even Car Commercials
Under pressure from the NFL, Toyota was forced to edit a commercial that showed a helmet-to-helmet tackle, even though the ad was about helping to prevent brain injuries in football....
New Sports Chat Show Held Inside Actual Sports Dome
As you well know, sports are fertile ground for ridicule, absurdity, and repeated failure. Onion SportsDome inflates on Comedy Central tonight, and hosts Mark Shepard and Alex Reiser will present all the ball-related news you can stand from right inside that dome....
Or You Could Use it In the Hot Tub
If you're going to go through the hassle of getting SCUBA certified and entering therapy to get over your irrational fear of fish, you might as well spring for this ultra-rad underwater swim mask with integrated waterproof digital camera....
Killing Me Softly with This Bacon
What could possibly be more delicious than crispy, crackly, succulent bacon? How about...wait for it...bacon covered with chocolate?...
The Road to Heaven Is Paved with Glazed Donuts
Donuts don't have to be for in-mall starvation attacks, road trips, county fairs, or your office's morale-boosting "Treat Fridays" anymore. You can now whip up a sextet of luscious dough-balls right in your very own home....
Boomshakalakaexpialidocious
That's right, the backboard-shattering, early-'90s arcade dunkfest known as NBA JAM is back. Now, with Sarah Palin, headbands, and new game modes, plus, old pal Grandmama. In case you were wondering, Mr. Boomshakala himself has been keeping busy by name-checking Deadspin....
Number of Productive Things You’ve Done Today: Zero
A long lunch, tweeting about fantasy football, copious consumption of Deadspin: You've officially done zero today. Stop being a complete waste of space and drink a vitaminwater zero™, with enough vitamins and taste to make you feel like you're doing something....
In Case You Missed the Beat Down
Why in the name of NBA JAM shouldn't Deadspin EIC A.J. Daulerio and contributing editor Drew Magary fly to LA to play 2-on-2 with ex-NBA power forward John Salley (aka Spider) and the short but court-prowess possessing Kevin Hench (the Henchman)?...
Boomshakalakaexpialidocious
That's right, the backboard-shattering, early-'90s arcade dunkfest known as NBA JAM is back. Now, with Sarah Palin, headbands, and new game modes, plus, old pal Grandmama. In case you were wondering, Mr. Boomshakala himself has been keeping busy by name-checking Deadspin....
Guess How Many Points Deadspin Scored Against John Salley
Why in the name of NBA JAM shouldn't Deadspin EIC A.J. Daulerio and contributing editor Drew Magary fly to LA to play 2-on-2 with ex-NBA power forward John Salley (aka Spider) and the short but court-prowess possessing Kevin Hench (the Henchman)?...
Sundays Are Tough On You, Little Buckaroo
We want every Deadspin reader to see how much this Sunday's play of the week enrages, elates, or dejects you and your game-watching dude cluster. Pathetic and/or entertaining football reaction videos are what we're after, so get your preferred video recording device ready for this week's football co...
Because He Can, Bear Grylls Jumps Onto A Moving Helicopter And Calls It An Alley-Oop
Bear Grylls is doing a three-part series of short videos for Degree Men deodorant in which Mark Messier "coaches" him through challenges from professional athletes. In the latest installment, Kevin Durant tells him to do a heli-oop. So he does....
Peeper Videos Of Kevin Durant Are A Dumb Viral Something Or Other For Nike
Here's a peeping Tom-style video, supposedly shot by this kid, in which Kevin Durant supposedly moves into what's supposedly his new house. It's an ad for Nike. Because that's all anything ever is anymore....
Grow Up and Drink Something Fancy, Manly
You've moved out of Mom's basement, so it's time to order something at the bar that doesn't come in size "yard." Try a Rusty Nail. It's fancy and manly, and an 18th-century rebel prince ran from England to Scotland with the recipe for Drambuie in his knickers—all so you could enjoy this very cocktai...
Grow Up and Drink Something Fancy, Manly
You've moved out of Mom's basement, so it's time to order something at the bar that doesn't come in size "yard." Try a Rusty Nail. It's fancy and manly, and an 18th-century rebel prince ran from England to Scotland with the recipe for Drambuie in his knickers—all so you could enjoy this very cocktai...
Nick Swardson Is a Friend to Gay Robots and Wheelchair-Bound Cats Alike
Watch him embody the spirit of weird in his brand-new Comedy Central sketch show Nick Swardson’s Pretend Time. Witness him as Lady Gaga’s brother Garry, a cop who shares his sister’s sartorial gene, work the mean streets in lace tranny sleeves....
Fall Is Here So Groom Yourself, For God's Sake
Dude, no one's buying the "bangin'" scraggle you grew at Burning Man. It's back to school for you and your facial hair! Craft your perfect fall stubble or beard (from 1/64" up to 23/32") with the Philips Norelco Vacuum Stubble and Beard Trimmer Pro....
Dæmon Babies and Fire-Breathing Beasts (and Breasts) Await
Living in NYC can make you feel like you're surrounded by mythological beasts, sci-fi freaks and fantasy faeries. Take a look into the TV mirror tonight for the season premiere of Comedy Central's animated horror-comedy series, Ugly Americans....
NFL Superperson Ray Lewis Runs with the Bears. Well, a Bear.
And the bear matches the superperson stride for stride. Then it smiles. Then it talks! Then something blows up. Even though they just ran the length of a football field, the bear and the superperson smell fresh and snappy because of Old Spice Showtime Deodorant....