ah Page 452 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Missouri Basketball Players Say Cheerleader Beatdown Was Self-Defense
Twist! The two Lady Tiger hoops players accused of roughing up a male cheerleader say that they did get physical with him, but only after he G-O-T A-G-G-R-E-S-S-I-V-E with their other female friend....

Missouri Basketball Players (Who Are Women) Beat Up Cheerleader (Who Isn't)
Much like their Kansas brethren, Missouri's athletic department is being torn asunder by intra-sports team strife. Only it's not the teams you usually expect, since we're talking about women's basketball and cheerleading. These kids do not compromise....

Last Night's Winner: Shysters
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like Utah Flash owner Brandt Andersen, who successfully duped 7,500 suckers into buying tickets to his arena by lying about Michael Jordan. It's a living....

Tim Tebow Messiah Watch: See How He Loved Football Edition
With apologies to Slate, the Tim Tebow Messiah Watch is our occasional look at the growing body of evidence — quotes, signs and wonders, excessively fawning prose — that the Florida quarterback is the Lamb of God....

In Hockey, This Man Is Considered A Consummate Pro
When Brendan Shanahan was a kid, his favorite player turned down his autograph request. When Brendan Shanahan made the NHL, he beat the hell out of said player at the puck drop. Do not mess with Brendan Shanahan. [Newark Star-Ledger]...

Joakim Noah To LeBron James: "You're A Jerk"
Last night's Cavs-Bulls game was marked by an argument between LeBron James and Joakim Noah, occasioned by King James dancing on the sidelines during Cleveland's 101-87 win. The b-word was apparently thrown, ooh!...

BYU-Utah: A "Burning Cauldron Of Loathing"
You recall the anti-Utah slam poem delivered by BYU quarterback Max Hall on Saturday. Now comes this photo of Jamie Whittingham, wife of Utah coach Kyle Whittingham, snapped just moments before she took a BYU fan's elbow to the grill....

Hated Rivals No Longer Allowed To Hate Each Other
BYU's Max Hall led his team to an incredible overtime win against hated rival Utah, but now he's been forced to apologize for hating his rival? I thought that was the whole point....

This Is Why Anaheim Hockey Fans Can't Have Nice Things
Anaheim's Scott Niedermayer offered his stick to a fan after he won star of the game. Unfortunately, it sparked a melee between two gentlemen and a blond woman as a helpless Niedermayer looked on from the ice. [Puck Daddy/HTA.SanFillippo]...

Tim Tebow Messiah Watch: Body-Painted Mary Magdalene Edition
With apologies to Slate, the Tim Tebow Messiah Watch is our occasional look at the growing body of evidence — quotes, signs and wonders, excessively fawning prose — that the Florida quarterback is the Lamb of God....

Last Night's Winner: Josh Pastner
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like Memphis coach Josh Pastner, who didn't even win! Don't think that won't stop him from becoming college basketball's new golden boy....

Hey Dude In The Back...What Number Is Kansas Ranked?
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....

Farm Poise
At last, we have someone to fill the void left by Mark Sanchez roughly seven interceptions ago. Meet James Vandenberg, Iowa's starting quarterback and America's new avatar of poise....

Isiah Thomas Can't Even Lose Properly
You'd think that someone with as rich and variegated a history of failure as Isiah Thomas would have the etiquette of losing down pat. But we are speaking of Isiah Thomas here. The man is a failure even at failure....

Who Says There's Nothing To Do In Oklahoma City?
You're young, rich, one of the most talented players on the planet. If you're Kevin Durant, how do you spend your days off? Getting into slapfights, and filming them....

Timberwolves GM Wants Fans To Know He Is Aware Of How Much Team Sucks
Mired in a nine-game slide, the Timberwolves are struggling to get acclimated to Kurt Rambis' triangle offense. Further, the team stinks. So, GM David Kahn did the only sensible thing - he wrote a letter to the team's 10 fans....

I Bet The Graphics Guy Who Cropped Indiana's Logo This Way Feels Like A Boob
Heh. Tit. And for those of you worried about this warping our young people, it has already been changed to a less-offensive image. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to make "BOOBLESS" appear on my calculator. (Thanks, reader Josh)...

SEC Refs Are Afraid Of Technology. Like, 1990s Technology.
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Tim Tebow Messiah Watch: Refreshed And Resurrected Edition
With apologies to Slate, the Tim Tebow Messiah Watch is our occasional look at the growing body of evidence — quotes, signs and wonders, excessively fawning prose — that the Florida quarterback is the Lamb of God....